CineMarter
Hitman - Agent 47 - Did They Even Play the Games?

Matthew Parkinson | 21 Aug 2015 12:00
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Did we need another Hitman movie? Of course not. We didn't need a first one, either.

Structurally, if you're wondering, the film plays out like this. Act 1: a terrible Terminator rip-off. Act 2: an awful Terminator 2 rip-off. Act 3: a bland Matrix storm-the-castle-and-rescue-Morpheus rip-off. Credits: they come before a fight that the film teases exactly once and that we might actually want to see, but don't get to because of reasons, I guess. Why was the fight teased at all if the film won't show it to us? What was the point of teasing it precisely a single time? Did anyone read this screenplay? Why did Skip Woods, who wrote the screenplay for the last film, get to co-write this one?

Here is how much Hitman: Agent 47 has to do with the videogames: (1) It has a character named 47. (2) There is fiber wire. (3) Before the title card, a couple of the shots somewhat resemble the cover artwork of one or two of the games. I'm not even a big Hitman fan - although the games have somehow all wound up on my Steam account... - but even I know that the film misses the entire point of the source material. It's gone a mainstream action route, which might be fine if the action was even halfway decent, and in doing so alienates those who made the games popular. There's a good movie to be made from this franchise, too; it's just a shame that we may never get it.

Another failed videogame adaptation, Hitman: Agent 47 delivers bland, same-y, and choppy action, cold characters, poor plot, a complete lack of thrills, and a misunderstanding of the source material. Did we need another Hitman movie? Of course not. We didn't need a first one, either. I'm not sure which of the two is better, but I don't think it matters. They're both poor adaptations of a game franchise that deserves better, and the new one is another addition to an ever-growing list of bad adaptations of videogames. Maybe the next one will be better.

Bottom Line: Hitman: Agent 47 misses the point of the videogames on which it's based and delivers a bland and generic action movie in that point's place.

Recommendation: Go (re)play the videogames instead of watching Hitman: Agent 47.

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If you want more of Matthew "Marter" Parkinson, you can follow him on the Twitter @Martertweet and check out his weekly movie podcast.

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