Game of Thrones
Game of Thrones Season Finale Review: Sitting on the Throne

Greg Tito | 16 Jun 2014 23:15
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Finally, we get to see the culmination of Tyrion's sentence and his beheading for the regicide ... no wait, Jaime is letting him out of jail. Why the hell didn't he do this before the fight with the Mountain? Oh well, plot holes aside, Jaime sends Tyrion through the secret passages of the Red Keep to meet with Varys and get the hell out of dodge.

Missing from the Brothers Lannister Jailbreak is the admission that Tyrion's first wife - the Tysha mentioned in that drunken monologue with Shae and Bronn in season one - wasn't actually a whore at all. In the books, Tywin forced Jaime to say she was a whore, and Jaime comes clean at this point, saying that Tysha actually did love Tyrion for who he was, not for his money.

All that's gone from the show, which I don't think I like. I guess Shae was a bit more fleshed out in this telling, but her betrayal is a poor substitute for the shit Tywin has done to Tyrion his entire life. Back in season one, Bronn said he'd kill the man who ordered 30 Lannister guards to rape his young wife in front of him. Well.

Tyrion doesn't tarry long in the passage. He goes straight up to the chamber of the Hand and what does he find? Shae sprawled naked in his father's bed. She even murmurs "my Lion" in her sleep before she realizes it's him. She goes for a knife, but Tyrion jumps on the bed. They struggle, and he eventually grabs a hold of the chain she wore to sleep. He pulls. Her dead head hangs over the bed in a mockery of the smile he once loved. Tyrion says he's sorry, crying, before his eyes alight on a crossbow.

Man, the shot of the little man carrying the crossbow and dragging a metal tool on the marble floor. There's work to be done.

Tywin is pooping. Thankfully, he also wears a robe to the privy so we don't have to see his man parts. Even though Tywin is the one with a crossbow on him, he shows nearly no respect to his son. He calls him Lannister, even says he wasn't going to execute him on the morrow, but he never respects his son. Tyrion admits to killing Shae, and his father's dismissal of her death is even more damning than the betrayal. "One more dead whore," Tywin says. "Say whore one more time, motherfucker," Tyrion says, channeling Samuel B. Jackson. He does, and Tyrion shoots.

Add patricide to the list. As if one bolt wasn't enough, he reloads and shoots another after Tywin still hasn't learned. Tyrion leaves his father for dead in the only place worthy of such a villain, the shitter.

Varys smuggles Tyrion out in a box, similar to the one that shipped Varys' ex-wizard master to King's Landing but now it will be used to get the dwarf out. The bells start ringing in the Red Keep. Someone has detected that either Tyrion is escaped or Tywin is dead, probably both. Varys hears the bells, and decides to get on the ship to leave King's Landing.

So that happened. Politically, things could not be more fucked up. Tywin Lannister is dead. The true ruler of the Seven Kingdoms is no more, while power in the North is yet to be determined between the Night's Watch, Stannis' knights, and the new Warden in the Boltons. Across the Sea, Daenerys is unsure of herself, especially after dismissing her most trusted advisor. And two more major characters will be headed that way soon, Arya and Tyrion. Will they meet? Will they make love? Who knows with this show?

There's a lot more to discuss about what was left out and what was changed, but I'll have to cover that in a different column. And there is a ton to talk about in our Game of Thrones Cast this week. I can't make time pass quicker, but you can check out all of our Game of Thrones coverage as we anxiously await season five and book six.

Get writing, George! The show is catching up to you!

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