First of all, I'd like to return momentarily to the subject of Mario Galaxy 2. I have to say I've really been given cause to reconsider my position on that game, thanks to the arguments of correspondent Chris E., whose eloquent email deserves to be reprinted in full:

"Dear Yahtzee,

You are a faggot. You suck the penis of over 100 different species of animal. You enjoy being raped up the bum by old, hairy men. Your dick is smaller than an average 12 year old's. All you do is say stupid things on teh internet for a living. You have a fetish for grandmas. Go and fuck yourself. Super Mario Galaxy 2 is the best."

What a debater. He should take it up full time. That way we could legitimately describe him as a mass-debater.


As a follow-up to my Singularity review (in brief: too much like various other, better games; and yet in many ways not enough like them) I thought I'd take the opportunity to give a little retrospective on games throughout history that have used time travel as a central theme. And I solemnly swear not to bring up Prince of Persia: Sands of Time again. Nor indeed will I bring up the even more time travel-centric Prince of Persia: Warrior Within. Although I guess I just did.

Incidentally my research was aided by this Wikipedia page, which was very convenient. Almost serendipitous, really. Like someone went back in time and informed the world of the past that some day a videogame journalist would quickly need a list of time travel videogames. Perhaps so that he could then knock off work early and be in time to get in front of a bullet intended for the Queen.

I confess this will be a rather incomplete digest, limited to the games I feel like talking about. Bonus points will be given to games that integrate time travel into the gameplay mechanics, rather than just using it as an excuse to run around shooting vikings.

Future Wars (Delphine Software, 1989):

Absolutely dreadful point and click adventure by French developers Delphine Software (who would later create the superlative platformers Another/Out of This World and Flashback) in which a window cleaner discovers a working time machine that exposes him to a conspiracy of extremely indirect aliens that spans the history of mankind. I include it here mainly for cathartic reasons.

I owned the game on my Amiga as a kid, and was stuck for many months on the very first room, in the time before GameFAQs, when dinosaurs ruled the earth. I had a little flag pin. I had a map. I knew I had to stick the flag pin into the map. But the game wouldn't let me just Use Pin On Map, I was expected to use it on a one-pixel-sized little hole in the map. I wouldn't mind so much, but why the fuck would there already be a hole, Future Wars? Surely the pin would make a hole for itself? Fuck you, Delphine Software.

Time Travel Analogy: Like Quantum Leaping into the body of Joan of Arc as she burns horrifically to death in terrible agony while onlookers jabber in poorly translated French.

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