Vatican Priest Pitches Religious MMO
"As long as our children are spending eight hours in front of the computer everyday, they might as well be learning about The Bible," said Father Ignatio Contadino at a game development conference earlier this week. "The idea came to me after a WoW guildmate joked about a 'multi-prayer' game, though he may have just been making fun of Asians."
"One of the common misconceptions is that it would be some sort of non-violent game. Fans of The Bible know there is no lack of violence in The Good Book. Players will be able to experience real Bible quests where they stone whores and homosexuals, smite heathens, and execute children who curse at their parents," continued Contadino.
"But, like any other multiplayer game, there will be penalties for failure," he explained. "For example: If your ox gores a slave, you must pay 25 shekels of silver to the slaveowner; and if your character dies you will have to wait three days and three nights for resurrection. We realize it's rough, but we'd like to keep The Bible MMO as true to the original verse as possible."
This innovative idea has received much praise from investors. The financial industry hasn't been this excited about a fusion of business and religion since Jesus went all "Indiana Jones" and whipped the money-lenders out of the church.