My efforts to grief the Shire Post aside, I'm actually here on business. First up, I joined the Bounders and am entitled to a new hat. Let's check it out:
Uh... no. Well, it's worth 75 coppers.
The second bit of business here in town is that I need to deliver a note from Mundo Sackville-Baggins to the Mayor. Mundo (hilariously) thinks that the Mayor should reimburse Mundo on account of Mundo being kidnapped and stupid. The Mayor doesn't take it well.
The Mayor starts rambling on about a letter he wants taken to someone else.
"You want me to deliver a letter for you?" I ask, raising an eyebrow. The postman is standing about five steps away from us, staring into space. So, the mayor himself would rather give his correspondence to a complete stranger than entrust it to the hands of his own post office. Clearly he knows that his entire mail system is a sham, a system of running fast by littering.
He knows! And he's not doing anything about it! That's as good as having his permission!
The Mayor lowers his voice to a conspiratorial tone, "I don't like to say this to too many people. But the truth is that the Shire Post can sometimes be a little... unreliable."
"Oh how dreadful." I observe. Yes, he knows the system is a sham. I know it's a sham. But does he know that I know that it's a sham?
He nods, "It's true, I swear. Anyway, I'd like for you to deliver this note to Lobelia Sackville-Baggins in Hobbiton." He offers me a slip of paper.
On one hand, hiking to Hobbiton is usually a pain. On the other hand, I have the speed-boosting aid of the Shire Post on my side. And it's always good to do favors for the Mayor. I take the paper, ignoring the strange, cock-eyed look I'm getting from the postman.
There are lots of other people standing around the town hall looking for help, but none of them are the mayor so none of them matter. Being a polite little Hobbit, I don't use my elbow when I shove them out of my way.