Shamus Plays

Shamus Plays: LOTRO, The Finale!

Shamus Young | 7 Jul 2010 09:00
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Amdir - or whatever he's calling himself now - is a screaming specter of magical terror. As with the Wight, he gives off waves of fear and darkness and his shrieks seem to shake the earth. I wade in and give him my best.

"You know," I say once we've put him down for good, "I think that's about as much adventure as I ever want to see in my lifetime."

Torthann smells his hand and makes odd faces.

I continue, "I mean, that was a lot of seriously screwed up stuff. Skeltons and Wraiths and Wights and a necromancer Dwarf."

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"And the rats," Torthann adds.

"Right. And the rats. The point is, I've got the clothes I wanted. I took care of Amdir. I gave Eogan his comeuppance. I think I'm done."

I make my way back to Strider in Bree. I don't know how things turned out with the Nazgul and he doesn't bring it up, but he's completely unharmed.

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"It grieves my heart that the enemy was able to turn Amdir thus. He was my fried and kinsman. My people will remember him as he was, good and noble."

Sensing that my moment has arrived, I make my move and offer him a shoulder to cry on.

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"It troubles me that the Nazgul have crossed the River and moved into Bree-land at just this time," he adds after a few moments of silent reflection.

"Oh sweetie, I'm so sorry about your friend," I say, hoping he'll take the hug.

"There are events in motion which could determine the fate of Middle-earth," he adds urgently.

I lower my arms. They're getting tired and he seems to be uninterested. I don't know what the man's problem is at this point. Is he thick? Is he just not getting the message here? Is he... does he not like girls or something?

"If you are able and willing, I have another task for you."

"You know what? I'm good," I tell him. "I think I need to get home. To my house. At #3 Wending Way. In Daisyglenn."

"So be it. You have already done much for these people."

"My house where, I might add, I have a really big bed. Probably even big enough for a man."

"Sounds like you will have great comfort once you return. Safe travels, little Hobbit."

"You're welcome to stop by when your adventure thing is over. I have tea and... anything else you might need."

"You are very kind."

"I hope to be!"

Well, I've done what I can. If he's any sort of a man, he'll give in and pay me a visit eventually. I just need to bide my time. So... time to head home.

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-The End-

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