Shamus Plays

Shamus Plays: Champions Online, Part 13

Shamus Young | 13 Oct 2010 09:00
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I'm sulking. The only sane person on our side (the good guys) is actually being mind-controlled by one of the bad guys. What am I supposed to do? Leave him like that, thus letting the bad guys win? Or free him, so that he can go back to being as loony as everyone else?

As I fly around, pondering this difficult question, I encounter ...


... an old woman. She's lost her kitty, and asks me to help find the little guy. Aw.

I've actually mentioned this quest before.


So ... you lost your cat. Okay. I've got a couple of minutes. Let's find him. Should I just look around this area or ... ?


Oh? You're walking? Look, there's no need for that. I can move faster without you. If you just stop.

Stop here.

Or here is good too. Pretty much anywhere.

If you'll just stop walking I can go find your cat ...

Oh. I see. This is an escort mission. Doesn't make any sense that you should need to escort a woman who just asked you to find her cat, but years ago someone told MMO developers that players LOVE escorting moronic / suicidal NPC's and now nobody can tell them different. And no escort mission would be complete without ...


Oh. Dudes. See? This is why you should have let me-

Ah! They're beating on the old woman?!? Why are they doing this? They really give her a pounding, too. I had no idea these guys had it in for old ladies so bad.

I apply firm, even impacts to make sure we get a nice, even coating of pain and death. I hate spotty work. The troublemakers thus dispatched, I turn back to my charge.

Okay lady, this whole thing is really strange and I wouldn't blame you at all for wanting to wait by the road while I look arou-


No? You're just that hardcore? Fine. But don't come crying to me when we get ...

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