Shoot Club

Shoot Club: The Quake Wars Wars, Part Two

Tom Chick | 11 Oct 2007 17:00
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I briefly considered switching sides so we'd have to run up the beach and assault the bunkers, but I didn't want to confuse the guys by giving them Strogg classes and weapons. Everyone knows what a soldier and rocket launcher are. But you have to play Quake Wars a bit before you figure out the difference between an Oppressor and an Obliterator.

So now me and Trevor are in the bunker on the right. I'm a soldier with a heavy machine gun and he's a medic, lying prone at my feet. He heals and defibrillates me as needed. Which, considering how poorly the bots aim, isn't very often.

"How much did you pay for the Radiohead album?" he asks while I pick off a few Strogg. I'm leaving most of them for the rest of the guys in the other two bunkers.

"Why? How much did you pay?"

"You go first."

"I paid fifteen dollars."

"You're such a liar."

"Okay, I paid five. How much did you pay?"

"I didn't. Yet."

"You haven't downloaded it yet?"

"I haven't paid yet. I'm waiting to decide how good it is."

"That's not how it works. You don't get to not pay if you don't like it."

"What are you talking about? There are no rules. I'm making my own rules. If I don't like it, I won't pay."

"And if you do like it, you'll pay extra?"

"Maybe. Did you really pay five dollars?"

"Not yet."

"I wonder why they don't do that with games. Someone should just make a game and put it online and let people try it before they pay. I wonder how come no one ever thought of that?"

"Hey, who's that down there?" In the distance, I see a GDF player running around on the beach. He's jumping and shooting wildly, circling around the spawning Strogg like a sheepdog. I put my reticle on him: Jude. "Jude, get back up here," I call into the other room, where he's sitting at one of the computers. "This is supposed to be like D-Day. You don't go down to the beach."

"I told him he was doing it wrong," Mike offers. Mike, who sucks at all games, has four xp.

"Hey, who's Pink Taco?" Jude hollers. "Quit fucking team killing me."

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