What is Love, really?

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You see over the last 1.3 years I have been deeply in love with a woman, she had her issues (being disabled in physical way, though her mind was brilliant) but I assured her that I would not leave her just because she is that way, I stood by her side at all times when she needed me. When her cat died, I volounteered to dig a grave, when she had a hospital appointment I was there with her, when her grandmother was in hospital I was there, when her abusive father came to visit I was there to hold her hand. We had lovely plans for the future, she was afraid of not affording university and not being able to go at all. I offered to give her the money, share some of the university money my grandad was meant to give me while insuring her its going to be okay. I gave up my friends, even my bestest friend, volountarily.

I suddenly fell into a depression, I do not know why I became so, I am speaking to a Psychiatrist to sort it out. I became weak both mentally and physically, I couldnt concentrate and all things like that. I took some anti-depression drugs which made me worse at the beggining and making me cold toward my love, I fought the feeling, tried to explain it to my beloved one as well. I thought of attempting suicide at a couple of times, falling in front of a train I took everyday. I decided to give up the drug, figuring out that this was the reason of my 'numbness' and I did. Slowly I reduced them and had strong enough will to stay off them, even during hard moments during college and returning feeling of doom and hopelessness. My depression made me think I do not love her anymore, while I stayed stubborn enough to know that I do. After I came off them I knew I loved her and felt it in my heart again. She said she does not want to take care of people, having to take care of her grandmother, being forced to in a way (but, dont we all have a choice?).

Now her also being in depression, her taking the anti-depression drugs she.... left me.... dumped me like an insignificant piece of rubbish. Over the phone, in a form of a text message. Out of all ways, letter, telegraph, bottled or even pigeon carrier. I shattered like a piece of glass, in shock at first, not even believing it happened at first. My friends that I have reunioned with have sided with me, volountarily, I have not asked them a single thing nor to break their connections to my once loved one. They have comoforted me and still do, as I am thinking I am falling into a depression yet again. However comforting my friends and family are, theres... theres something missing....

And now that you know my story, I am asking you this question....

...What is love...
...and is it worth it...

A chemical reaction made for the purpose of keeping people together...?

I dunno, that's what this hopelessly romantic friend of mine keeps telling me.

EDIT: I forgot your other question, and yes!
Love is always worth it, but love is not the only thing worth giving for.

Friends are family are things you should never forget.

A. No one really knows what the hell love is.
B. Yes, it can be worth it. Sometimes it isn't, sometimes it is.


sorry couldn't resist.
It's basically just a chemical reaction to hormones and personality that gives a large amount of euphoria in the brain. the only thing that comes close is the number of chemicals that are used when you have a child, the same areas of the brain activate and produce many chemicals causing the feeling of love.

*Insert Haddaway reference here*
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jpN60KKBAjc&ob=av3em
Eleanor Lamb once said that love is just a chemical (or a series of hormones, actually, but she's a videogame character, so whatever), and that we give it meaning by choice. You've been chosen for romantic abandonment, and now you have to choose a new path to pave. We can't give you advice on how to live your life. Only the higher powers can do that.

i was gonna do a Haddaway joke, but nvm

You've been drinking again haven't you?

A few posts in and several Haddaway references...

Screw this, imma gonna watch Night At the Roxbury.

OT: What is love? No idea. My definition changes. As for whether its worth it...

Well, its gotten me not much but heartache. So I doubt it.

Reaver3:
i was gonna do a Haddaway joke, but nvm

Heehee... ninja'd.

Xartyve2:
You've been drinking again haven't you?

Is that really necessary?

Love is (usually) just human horniness disguised by multiple layers of supposed meaning and depth, fooling the individual into thinking that they are more than a simple animal.

Sometimes it isn't and two people may want each other for more than the obvious, but that is damn rare.

rokkolpo:
A chemical reaction made for the purpose of keeping people together...?

I dunno, that's what this hopelessly romantic friend of mine keeps telling me.

Albert Einstein
"How on earth are you ever going to explain in terms of chemistry and physics so important a biological phenomenon as first love?"

That's horrible. I don't think I can say anything other than if you have the willpower to keep on going for someone else, you have the will power to keep on going for yourself.

Love, I guess it's a tricky thing, getting thrown about, losing it's meaning.

Love brings you the best moments of your life, when your with that special someone, it's probably one of the best feelings you can have, however all those moments can be ripped away with a few words, it all becomes meaningless and becomes one of the worst moments.

So is it worth it?

Can't possibly say.

Didn't answer the question, damn >.<

Love is a lot of different things with different "twists" summarized together in one word, where the only common aspect of all those things, is sympathy/attraction/liking something.

One may ask if the subset of love you experienced "is worth it" - but that would not be the same, as judging everything that may be called "love".

What is any thought? any action if it isn't a electro-chemical impulse in your brain first?

All of the emotion are difficult to define, any simple answer will invariably be wrong for one or more aspects.

From what you describe it was a co dependent emotionally abusive relationship anyway, you are well out of it.

Love is what you make of it my friend.
If you decide love is a fictitious thing that humanity has created in order to make ourselves seem more unique than animals, then that is what love is to you.

Sure it's a chemical and hormonal reaction in your brain but the term love is a very human thing. No one knows what love is because it's different to everyone. I for one believe that it is a state of mind, such as joy and depression. Having gone through a very similar experience, I can still say that love is to me, what the sun is to the flower. You need it, you want it and it is a driving force for everyone. Whether it's a love of money, power or a person, it drives us all in one way or another.

maybe... but only little cider.

Love is a kind of madness. We suspend logic and facts cause we feel a certain way.

Not suspending logic for love is more harmful to your being than actually doing just that, so it all works out in the end, though it IS a situation of picking the lesser of two evils.

Dreiko:
Love is a kind of madness. We suspend logic and facts cause we feel a certain way.

Not suspending logic for love is more harmful to your being than actually doing just that, so it all works out in the end, though it IS a situation of picking the lesser of two evils.

Madness? THIS IS .... errmm.... I forgot the word....

Dreiko:
Love is a kind of madness. We suspend logic and facts cause we feel a certain way.

Not suspending logic for love is more harmful to your being than actually doing just that, so it all works out in the end, though it IS a situation of picking the lesser of two evils.

Please don't say "we", when what you mean is "i" or "many people". Love can be perfectly in sync with logical conclusions - but for this, it's necessary to understand some things first. Among those things, is noticing that the popular ideal of "how" love is supposed to be like, is a highly contradictory one.... no wonder that it collides with logic. Thing is: It doesn't have to work that way.

Project_Omega:

Dreiko:
Love is a kind of madness. We suspend logic and facts cause we feel a certain way.

Not suspending logic for love is more harmful to your being than actually doing just that, so it all works out in the end, though it IS a situation of picking the lesser of two evils.

Madness? THIS IS .... errmm.... I forgot the word....

Sparta, you're actually talking to a Greek person btw so nice timing lol.

Project_Omega:

Madness? THIS IS .... errmm.... I forgot the word....

I'm sure it's

THIS IS ATHENS.

Rakkana:

rokkolpo:
A chemical reaction made for the purpose of keeping people together...?

I dunno, that's what this hopelessly romantic friend of mine keeps telling me.

Albert Einstein
"How on earth are you ever going to explain in terms of chemistry and physics so important a biological phenomenon as first love?"

I bet that friend of mine can, if I remember, I will get back to you on this.

Project_Omega:
...What is love...
...and is it worth it...

I'm sorry it turned out the way it did.

I'm going to quote what I wrote two days ago;

I am a introverted thinker so naturally, I think a lot and I like thinking. But I am also very emotional of myself so quiet often I think about my feelings. This and the previous week have gotten me to think about what I believe is many peoples' favorite thinking subject;

What is love?

Ask a scientist or biologist this question and you're answered with that it's a series of toxics in your brain, similiar to that when you take drugs. This is true, love is a drug.

Several times I have seen adults tell their kids that "Oh no, you aren't in love. You're too young to be that. Now go out and sleep around, you need to have a life and try different people before you settle down and fall in love."

These people are wrong.
So then, what is love you may ask me?
Love is what you feel it to be. You can be young and feel love stronger and better than someone who is 50 who had several relationships and lovers. Experiance does not equal to "I know what love is, you don't". Only you can say if you feel what you feel is love or not. No body else.

Is it worth it?
You decide.

To quote HK-47: "Definition: Love is making a shot to the knees of a target 120 kilometers away using an Aratech sniper rifle with a tri-light scope. Statement: This definition, I am told, is subject to interpretation. Obviously, love is a matter of odds. Not many meatbags could make such a shot, and fewer would derive love from it. Yet for me, love is knowing your target, putting them in your targeting reticle, and together, achieving a singular purpose, against statistically long odds."

Breaking it down is pointless. Love is what you let it be. And it's worth it.

Edit:

Zeithri:

Ask a scientist or biologist this question and you're answered with that it's a series of toxics in your brain, similiar to that when you take drugs. This is true, love is a drug.

He did ask a scientist and that's not what I said :)

Love has many faces, and isn't limited to individuals. You sound as if you have been taught that love is what makes a relationship work. What makes a relationship work is actually both people wanting and working together to make it work. It doesn't, in fact, need love. Although that helps. Also, the biggest problem I noticed is this: you gave up your friends.

That is a problem. Love is not something that should require you to abandon all other loves. And as human beings we can't have all our needs met healthily by one person. We love many people through out our live, in different ways and to varying degrees. We love our friends, our families, and our lovers. To cut ourselves off from all of that, or even part of it, as you did, is the cut off a piece of yourself.

"Love" in the romantic, hollywood sense doesn't exist, but best friends who decide to commit to sharing their lives and loves for as long as they both live is an admirable goal, and while not perfect by any means is certainly "worth it" if commited to in full knowledge. It's like entering into half as business partnership and half as romance song. Each partner must sing their part, make themselves think positively, be practical and optimistic.

I'm so sorry to hear what happened to you. I've also just be left after more than 10 years together. I've spent every non-work waking minute packing and moving out to make way for his new love. I'm so tired, but at least I've got so much to do I don't have too much time to feel sad though I admit there have been a couple tearful panicky moments.

As for your question - what is love? It's giving yourself, heart and soul, mind and body, to another person. It's feeling a bond with another that is unbreakable. Until it breaks, then it's the depths of despair, fear and depression.

Love is life amplified.

Eh, that is life.It has its ups and down,lefts and rights,curves and straights and all I can tell ya is it gets better when ya least expect it

Lyx:

Dreiko:
Love is a kind of madness. We suspend logic and facts cause we feel a certain way.

Not suspending logic for love is more harmful to your being than actually doing just that, so it all works out in the end, though it IS a situation of picking the lesser of two evils.

Please don't say "we", when what you mean is "i" or "many people". Love can be perfectly in sync with logical conclusions - but for this, it's necessary to understand some things first. Among those things, is noticing that the popular ideal of "how" love is supposed to be like, is a highly contradictory one.... no wonder that it collides with logic. Thing is: It doesn't have to work that way.

My case was that everything is colored by love, it's beyond your control just like madness is. Thinking you're logical and being logical are two separate things, no crazy or evil person thinks themselves so. What I'm comparing it to is the person's acts if love wasn't in the picture.

Take a simple example, people with kids instantly love them, it doesn't make sense, the kid is just a baby that squeaks and has no personality, either every loving parent is shallow dim-witted idiot or love is just something that doesn't go together with logic.

lee1287:
Love is never having to say you're sorry. Lol.

Loves something girls tell themselves to make them feel less slutty after banging a dude the first hour they met.

Like if guys don't need to hear that ;3

I've said this before, and I'll say it again:

Love is a horrific, despicable, disgusting, malefic sensation and a complete perversion of logic and sense.

rokkolpo:
A chemical reaction made for the purpose of keeping people together...?

While that's true, every thought and emotion, from boredom to fear, could be described as nothing more than chemical reaccions and electric signals in our bodies. So that's like saying nothing.

But... yeah, it's hard to describe an emotion. I like to think that we ourselves decide what love is. It just depends on what you want it to be.
When I think of love I allways feel kind of nostalgic and sad in a soft and nice way. It doesn't make sense, I know, but who cares?

Gruchul:
To quote HK-47: "Definition: Love is making a shot to the knees of a target 120 kilometers away using an Aratech sniper rifle with a tri-light scope. Statement: This definition, I am told, is subject to interpretation. Obviously, love is a matter of odds. Not many meatbags could make such a shot, and fewer would derive love from it. Yet for me, love is knowing your target, putting them in your targeting reticle, and together, achieving a singular purpose, against statistically long odds."

Breaking it down is pointless. Love is what you let it be. And it's worth it.

Edit:

Zeithri:

Ask a scientist or biologist this question and you're answered with that it's a series of toxics in your brain, similiar to that when you take drugs. This is true, love is a drug.

He did ask a scientist and that's not what I said :)

Sir, for using my favourite quote (of my favourite character) from KOTOR, you get a cookie.

I would give it to you if I had the power....

Is love worth it? Maybe...

Is the pain you have to go through to get love worth it? No...

Love. It's what I say is the most wonderful feeling in the world, until it is robbed from you. Then it becomes the worst thing you've ever felt.

Love is knowing you have someone who loves you as much as you do them. Love is being able to tell someone your darkest secrets and be sure that they would never back away from you should you tell them. Love is holding someone close to you, looking into their eyes, smiling softly to them as you two don't have a care in the world, all that matters is the two individuals being together. Love is feeling secure when you would otherwise be panicking, if only just slightly. Love is anticipating the next moment you'll see your loved one, and miss them as soon as they leave. Love is a thing you can not control.

Love is all I really want out of life. To find that special someone I can be with. Maybe I'll find them, maybe not. I will just have to see what the future brings.

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