Poll: Could you beat me up?

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Topic is in the title

Do you think you could beat me up?

Lunch money taking is also optional but we will always be at the flagpole after class

You kidding? I eat punks like you for breakfast! Mmm...breakfast tacos...

I'm fucking crazy, of course I could! I would leap at you, knock you to the ground and just pummel you. The crowds watching would be cheering at first, but then it gets dark; there's blood everywhere. Somebody sobs "STOP HITTING HIM! HE'S ALREADY DEAD", a few members of the crowd try to pull me off of you but I'm still swinging away. A grim sight indeed.

Maybe, but I like you too much to try. I can't imagine what you could do that'd make me want to engage in an hour-long awkward slap-trading and sleeve-pulling match with you. :I

I'd rather watch you fight T0ad and JoJo, to be honest.

I'm down so long as the whole affair is choreographed with a foregone conclusion. Of course I'll have to run it by my agent first.

Probably. But I find no shame in sucker punching people with cinder blocks, so the list of people I couldn't beat up is fairly short.

I could do anything you want, bb, but that'll cost you extra.

I could beat you down with my mind alone. Just a stray thought and you'd go down

It depends on which one of us pissed off Ronda Rousey first. If you had, I'd just sadly hold what was left of your face under a pillow and sing to you. If I had pissed her off first, though, you could just dump what was left of me in a toilet or rubbish bin.

I dunno but I bet my dad could beat up your dad

We're in the same state and you used autistic in a negative way, yeah I'm pretty sure I could.

I can't even punch a dent in a packet of butter, so probably not.

Well, I've proven that I can easily sneak up on you undetected, so that gives me some substantial alpha-strike advantages.

And I don't fight "clean"....

I don't know to what condition you have to smash a taco into for it to qualify as having been beaten up, but I think with my strength I'll reach an adequate end result.

Well, I'm 6'1 and weigh 230 odd pounds, so...I'm 'a bet probably.

But I wouldn't. You're too cool. I mean...if you got in a mood, I might have to put you on the ground and tie your hands behind your back, but I wouldn't beat you up.

And yes, I could do that. The big vest I'm wearing in that picture isn't for show; I keep stuff in it. Stuff like rope. And change. And my phone.

EDIT: Daww, was this entire post just a way for you to quietly announce that you have a girlfriend? Congradulations, man!

...I think...

Yes and no.

Hear me out with this one.

So I have like no upper body strength, but gosh if I don't kick like a horse. I once made someone cry by kicking them so many times.

I reckon I can at least do enough damage to make us both regret the fight. I have nothing to lose so I'd go all in and probably fight dirty.

Are you willing to fight dirty, Taco?

Taco, we've hung out at the Expo both times it was around.

I think you know the answer to that question.

*cracks knuckles*

The answer is yes, but why would I wish to harm the glorious Fuhrer of the League?

I just have one question for you, Taco.

EDIT: Dammit. The video won't connect.

PainInTheAssInternet:
I just have one question for you, Taco.

EDIT: Dammit. The video won't connect.

Fixed.

OT: Probably not. I don't have any real ability when it comes to fighting, I have no upper body strength and why would I want to beat you up anyway?

I'm 6'3, 220lbs, strong boned and have a vicious streak a mile wide so yeah I "could" beat you up; but I wouldn't beat you up. I have very, very, very rarely had to resort to violence, and I have an incredibly slow temper. You would have to pretty much hit me first in order to provoke me to attack. Or insult my wife or kids to their face. That would do it.

How could I beat up out Lord and Savior? PRAISE TACO!

I'm an alpha-nerd. I wrestled in high-school, I regularly bike long distances, and I can run (But not skip) with a 180 pound man on my shoulder. Plus I'm from Brooklyn. I would destroy you.
Is it cannibalism if you're an anthropomorphous taco?
*Eats @PsychicTaco115 in one bite*
There's some long-pig on this taco.

Bro! Bro! Bro! Bro! Bro! I would totes beat 'yo ass down! Straight up southern Ohio style!

You have 4 GF's now, nice start on your harem, ~onii-chan.

People seem to keep getting bigger and bigger on here, so I'm 6'9 305 lbs, I could TOTALLY beat you up.

Well, I'm 9'11" 613 lbs and can bite through a cinder block, so probably. But I dunno, you get some of that salsa in my eyes, could make things difficult.

In case anyone's harboring any reservations, I hear Taco's been talking shit about us, and he's got lunch money to boot. Anyone want to go halfsies on the spoils?

I voted for the cannibalism choice because of course I did
I am also keeping his skin as well I think I will look quite dashing in it SO HANDS OFF!

The Almighty Aardvark:
In case anyone's harboring any reservations, I hear Taco's been talking shit about us, and he's got lunch money to boot. Anyone want to go halfsies on the spoils?

...Why does a sentient lunch have lunch money?
...Unless...
CANNIBAL! (Is a cannibal one who eats humans or one who eats their own kind? It's an important distinction that doesn't really come up much)

Souplex:

The Almighty Aardvark:
In case anyone's harboring any reservations, I hear Taco's been talking shit about us, and he's got lunch money to boot. Anyone want to go halfsies on the spoils?

...Why does a sentient lunch have lunch money?
...Unless...
CANNIBAL! (Is a cannibal one who eats humans or one who eats their own kind? It's an important distinction that doesn't really come up much)

Looks like cannibal applies, although in this context I think I prefer "Additional toppings"

*thinks* Maybe... I mean, I'll mostly be the one making sex-sults at myself, but I'm sure in the end, I would have still secretly won the bet...

Other than that, I think you could fuck me up... It's too bad I'll be the one on the bed... enjoying it... ;p

EDIT:

WOOPS: Meant to Tag Souplex not this guy.

Souplex:

The Almighty Aardvark:
In case anyone's harboring any reservations, I hear Taco's been talking shit about us, and he's got lunch money to boot. Anyone want to go halfsies on the spoils?

...Why does a sentient lunch have lunch money?
...Unless...
CANNIBAL! (Is a cannibal one who eats humans or one who eats their own kind? It's an important distinction that doesn't really come up much)

I dunno about OP, but I'd definitely kick this guys ass.

Can I use my gun? If so, still no, because I don't actually own a gun. I am a failure as an American/Texan. Please make your victory swift and decisive, so that the shame I bring upon my household might be ended sooner.

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