You know you've been on the Escapist too long when...

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Manchester is being considered the new capital.

The cow's jumped over the spoon.

The trash needs to go out.

You realize the trash has been inside you all along

Kratos has a new kid.

Someone's resurrected the supreme warlord.

Crepe and chocolate is the national dish of the UK.

There's no peanut butter left in the attic.

There is a young gentleman in the living room with seventeen parrots.

(Oh) I swear to you (I'll be there for you), this is not a Drive By.

Someone soiled their diaper again.

You don't remember taking the placement exam

The time zones are merging together.

you built robots to do all your daily tasks.

Egg nog is coming through the walls.

You're leaking brain lubricant.

Someone has knocked some sense into the Argentinians.

The entire population of India has vanished overnight.

No one knows what it's like to be a milkman.

There's lead in the cheese supply.

It's the Tudor period, Part 2.

The Mars One program is now proposing to build a scale model of Cloud City and levitate it into orbit.

Dominic is now a saint.

Profile pictures are edgier than ever before

The Danish Blue is off.

Hellraiser is on TV.

I remember when Nu-Metal was cool.

UltraDeth is talking about Nu-Metal. Clarification: this is bad.

I liked Nu-Metal in Pre-teens.

OT: Naughty Dog have unleashed hype.

Uncharted 7: A Thieving Thief Thieves Things is out.

The neighbour has passed out in the sink.

Mice are eating your legs.

Someone shat on Pluto.

To this day no one has called up Sean Hannity

The pick-up truck outside is looking a bit sexy.

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