Escape to the Movies: Gamer

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Like some other people above I was pretty sure this was going to suck as well. Also, about some of your bad video game movie examples. I think with a lot of the first ones one of the big troubles was that there was esentially no story to tell. Take Double Dragon for instance. A girl get's punched in the gut and carted off and two guys go after the bad guys. Not a hole lot there. Then theres Street Fighter, the plot of any given charecter can be summed up in a singe paragraph, it's also compleatly superfluas to the game....and why couldn't bloodrayn just be set in world war 2 like it's suposed to!?

Anyway, good review, I probably will end up seeing it with one of my friends though. Also, I thought Jorard Buttler was pretty good in The Ugly Truth. XD

not at all surprised to hear that "gamers" sucks, and im suprised when the bread pops up from the toaster.

also, horrible joke ahead

Disthron:
Like some other people above I was pretty sure this was going to suck as well. Also, about some of your bad video game movie examples. I think with a lot of the first ones one of the big troubles was that there was esentially no story to tell. Take Double Dragon for instance. A girl get's punched in the gut and carted off and two guys go after the bad guys. Not a hole lot there. Then theres Street Fighter, the plot of any given charecter can be summed up in a singe paragraph, it's also compleatly superfluas to the game....and why couldn't bloodrayn just be set in world war 2 like it's suposed to!?

Anyway, good review, I probably will end up seeing it with one of my friends though. XD

"Double Dragon," like almost every arcade-brawler that came before or after, is at least partially inspired by "The Warriors," which gets an entire feature film out of the following premise: "One street gang has to fight they're way on foot from one end of New York to the other versus every other gang in every other territory." If someone made THAT into a successful feature, there's no excuse for "Double Dragon" to screw the pooch almost two decades later.

As to Street Fighter... most tournament-fighting games descend from tournament kung-fu movies like "Master of the Flying Guillotine" or "Enter the Dragon." To my mind, this has always been one of the most perfect action-movie formulas: You have a central location - the tournament - an excuse to have lots of diverse characters come together without plot contrivances and you NEVER have to come up with a dopey excuse to have an action scene: just "bang the gong" and "it's time for X to fight Y!" All the structure and plotting issues are taken care of in a few strokes by the premise, leaving you with plenty of room to get into characters and intrigue. Even VAN DAMME made a few decent movies in this vein.

Pallindromemordnillap:
You spelt parallel wrong. Sorry, just felt I had to nitpick about something.

I do wonder if Gerard "That guy from 300" Butler will ever be able to shake off what that film did...

Not as long as the internet exists

I'le probably watch this, looks dumb and stupid (Same thing) but it also looks like Popcorn movie, it's not going to be a shawshank movie or as engaging as Saving Private Ryan but with a shit load of food, a good amount of beer and a room full of friends who actively play video games, I can imagine this is going to be one of those movies :).

Also thinking about the review and the premise of the film this almost sounds like Condemned(Not the deeply atmospheric balls on wall, head hide up arse game but the shitty Steve Austin movie) granted this movie seems a little more action packed.

few good post before me, I see

the spoiler tag above - click it XD

Will Smith as Link would be awesome, it'd be robot legend saving princess from ailens XD
Plus, all the people going "but he's black, he can't play Link" would be awesome rant to hear XD

I see this move just to watch Michael C.Hall act, as I like him very much in Dexter and would like to see more of him. Sometimes its fun to watch actors you like to get to know their potential.

The problem isn't that games have unorginal stories or plain ripoffs - the problem is that such story still works in this medium, and most people acept more bullshit unlike movies. Most stories are like "you're the hero, and there's a evil corporation - go shoot it" and as long as the shooting is good people like it - but the horror begins when someone tries to make good movie out of it.
I know that there is a possibility of Dizzy being a good Pixar movie (because they make awesome movies), but even Bomberman could be a good movie even if all that was picked from the game was a technology. Hero with bombgun that has an adventure and as long you swing three or four creative thoughts to the plot (plottwist not necessary) then it might be good.

I'm not surprised at all to hear that Gamer is basically a shallow action flick, but it is refreshing to hear that it doesn't give gaming any special moral treatment one way or the other.

I think my favorite part of this review is learning that the Crank movies are watchable. From the previews, I thought they looked surprisingly entertaining, in a totally balls-out unapologetic action sort of way.

B1130:
I might go see it now i thought it was going to be a propaganda film. but the silent hill movie good?

He din't say it was "good" just that it did not suck and by merits its watchable not really that enjoyable but far from painful unlike say Max Payne god that name sure wasnt kidding.

Always nice to see an ExistenZ reference. I also have fond memories of watching The Last Starfighter and Tron while growing up.

There will probably never be another "are you playing the game, or is it playing you?" movie done as well as ExistenZ. Not gonna happen. The entire movie is worth watching just for the last few minutes. Sort of like The Game. It's a crying shame both movies have been pretty much completely ignored by, well, everyone.

Told you.

Eagi:
I would say Gerard did a pretty awesome job in Rock 'n' Rolla, so for me that's even better than 300.

I agree with you, he did very well in Rock 'n' Rolla and 300 in my eyes was horrible.

MovieBob, I am a tolerant person. But don't bash Halo because you've only played the games. READ. THE FUCKING. BOOKS! The best plots for the Halo series have come from the history created by actual authors! Not Joseph Staten or whoever writes the scripts at Bungie. I garuntee that if they make the Movie based on Halo: Fall of Reach they will have a freaking blockbuster on their hands. If you still don't like the books, then fine! I've done all I can. If that cant convince you, that's all your opinion. I just want you to give the series a chance. Don't romp on it because of the slipshod writing of the games! Other than that, good review.

Gear001:
Snip

I hate fanboys, I don't think MovieBob has ever stated that he has or hasn't read the books. The fact is that he's talking about a Video Game being adapted into a movie not a Book that was adapted from a video game into a movie. Personally I enjoyed the Halo storyline but you can't please every one I just don't go jumping down peoples throats when they don't appreciate some thing as much as I do. It's his opinion, if you don't agree with him then that's fine, I don't 100% agree with all his reviews, I though Transformers 2 was a fun little movie (though I do get that the movie could have been much, much more) and no way worse then Batman and Robin.

Zelda: the Movie

Starring Will Smith as Link

Anyway, disappointing that this is shit, the first Crank movie is one of my favourite movies of all time.

lordlee:
Bob... did you just reference "Blood: The Last Vampire" in that review?

...And you haven't reviewed "Ponyo" yet because...?

Ponyo isn't a "nerdgasm" movie, wich are the only movies that get reviewed here.

So if he hates it then we will love it.... woo

The Big Eye:
As far as crappy-knockoff-movies-of-crappy-knockoff-video-games are concerned, I think a passing mention of Hitman wouldn't've have hurt; that one pretty much epitomizes this whole syndrome: take a good movie, make a middling videogame, and turn it into a truly awful film adaptation. They won't be able to make good movies based on video games until video games start having good, not-stolen storylines.
Meh, I still think a Halo movie could be good. I'm eager to be proven wrong, though, if it means they finally make the damn thing.

I didnt think Hitman was that bad if you judge it by its own merrits.

So if he hates it then we will love it.... woo

Aw man. It looked nice.

I was pretty sure this was going to be the result when I saw the *poster* for this movie.

Susan Arendt:

Oh, and sorry, but Silent Hill sucked, too. Some marvelous eye candy in it, but overall, it was just straight shite.

It certainly wasn't the worst, nor was it the best.
Yet I'm still clueless as to why they chose to go through with the unnecessary inclusion of Pyramid Head. Fanservice is fanservice, but atleast let it make sense.

As for the review: Quite good. Pretty informative, and hit all the right keys.

lordlee:

The Big Eye:
until video games start having good, not-stolen storylines.

image

+1 Internets.

I might still see this. Just because shooting people is fun and watching other people shoot eachother is fun.

Also, the thing is with games to movies, is they have the wrong direction. I feel a good game to movie(link, halo, etc) could be made if the director focuses on different parts of the story, rahter than the same story in the game(as they would be boring to watch)/

But, I digress. Nice review, but I still might see it anyway.

Gamer and Death Race are now starting a trend that tells me what not to see.

Someone has to win (Set Number) of (Competitions) to get cleared of (Crime Not Committed), but the host of (Competition) wants to make sure character doesn't get set free for some reason.

Any objections?

First thought after seeing the trailer: "OMG it's got motherfucking DEXTER in it!!! Must see!!!".

And after reading a bit about it: "Oh. That sucks".

KingPiccolOwned:

lordlee:
[quote="The Big Eye" post="6.137829.3100191"] until video games start having good, not-stolen storylines.

{Aforementioned Picture}

+1 Internets.

Ahh! How do I interpret Jasper threatening me with a blunt object? I'm gonna try the stop-drop-and-roll, but I don't think it'll work...

There are plenty of original story lines out there, you just need to know where to look. Psychonauts, Brutal Legend, Portal, Mirror's Edge, there are good games out there, the developers just choose the repetitive shite because its easier to produce. Not to mention, no game rip-off is going to seem original IT WAS A GAME FIRST. No FPS games as movies please! :€

Susan Arendt:
Oh, and sorry, but Silent Hill sucked, too. Some marvelous eye candy in it, but overall, it was just straight shite.

I quite agree Silent Hill had no redeeming qualities..... i was at a friend's house a few days ago he insisted we watch it cos apparently it's "One of the greatest movies of all time"...

i'd also like to say that the first Mortal Kombat film is bloody awesome.

Linksworld12:
whos was the first "Link" that he showed?

Micheal Cera

ok.... as a long time gamer I'm going to point out that teabagging has been around since LONG before Halo was even conceived. Way to know what you're talking about.

I saw the movie and liked it. yeah, it was very been there done that but at the same time it did put a nice spin on the gaming movie idea.

I know you don't like Halo but I honsetly think it has great potential for a movie. Just look at the new live action commercial for ODST. Or look at what Peter Jackson and Neill Blomkamp did with District 9. If any videogame movie has a shot at being a triple-A title I really believe Halo is it.

Gear001:
MovieBob, I am a tolerant person. But don't bash Halo because you've only played the games. READ. THE FUCKING. BOOKS! The best plots for the Halo series have come from the history created by actual authors! Not Joseph Staten or whoever writes the scripts at Bungie. I garuntee that if they make the Movie based on Halo: Fall of Reach they will have a freaking blockbuster on their hands. If you still don't like the books, then fine! I've done all I can. If that cant convince you, that's all your opinion. I just want you to give the series a chance. Don't romp on it because of the slipshod writing of the games! Other than that, good review.

The books are mediocre at best. I'd group them in the 'Fans of sci fi and/or Halo will like them,' in that it's got all the classic elements of pulp sci-fi. But they bring almost no new ideas to the table; i had read dozens of power-armoured-super-soldiers-kick-alien-ass before i read the halo books, and there was nothing *outstanding* about them, save for the fact that they were part of the Halo franchise. They serve as a nice compliment to the games, yes, but as books they definitely have little to lift them up and beyond average sci fi.

gamegod25:
I know you don't like Halo but I honsetly think it has great potential for a movie. Just look at the new live action commercial for ODST. Or look at what Peter Jackson and Neill Blomkamp did with District 9. If any videogame movie has a shot at being a triple-A title I really believe Halo is it.

District 9 was an excellent film because they were able to take a very overdone idea - aliens comeing to earth - and then use that very general guideline to create a film that not only holds its own as an action flick, but also manages to challenge many of the accepted conventions of science fiction. With a Halo movie, there's already so much canon out there that any writer will be hampered by all the things that are 'must includes,' whether it be subconciously or no. Not to mention Halo is a name that made its fame because it was an alien shooter-up. I mean seriously, how many of us actually liked the game solely because of the plot? It was vaguely interesting because it was military sci fi, but the real reason we liked it was because it was a pretty decent FPS. Any producer, director, and studio who would make the Halo film would understand that and I am quite certain they will emphasize action over story. It may be good in that respect, but i doubt it will have lasting impact as a deeper and provoking movie.

ok you are all saying it sucks because some guy tells you it does. form your own opinions you dam sheep.

Just as I suspected. This is another Hollywood cash in on popular trends in a pathetic attempt the refill the cocaine buckets. For other examples please see- Fast and the Furious, Fighting (dumbest movie name ever by the way), and any urban dance movie you damn well please.

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