Critical Miss: The Board

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Nice. I particularly enjoyed that "loud things" and "long hair" was on the things we don't like list.

Lovely, made me laugh. The expression on Tim's face was just priceless...
Also: awesome hat you got there.

Hilarious, the art's looking very stylish as well! :D

P.S. Unicorn cup with a twisty straw!

Everything is made better with Unicorns! :D

Anyway, this sadly seems frighteningly accurate to me. The mentality of the ESRB, at least. Though it's still nowhere near as bad as Australia. If the ESRB are all six-year-olds, then the Australian ratings people are probably still in the womb... :P

Dude! It's like, slowbro in the last pic!

Oh come on, you can't call those funky straws childish. They are awesomepants.

Honestly, the amount of ridicule/ire directed at the ESRB's expanded ratings these days is rather confusing to me - as the point of the ESRB is to inform parents (including those who would rather not immerse themselves in bad language - yes, such people do exist) of the content of the game, and has no bearing on older, more responsible people's access to said game that I can see, it seems rather childish to poke fun at them for doing their job - a job that indirectly benefits the gaming public!

The ESRB expanded rating isn't meant for the hardcore gamer! Heck, it's not even meant for the casual gamer! It's meant for the parent trying to see if the content of the game fits within their particular standards for their children's access - similar, in all honesty, to a "family" review site for films. Yet it gets ridiculed up and down the Internet - and for what? For censoring coarse language? For making a list of all the possible "infractions" a parent might find in the game? Honestly...

My problems with the ESRB are that

A: They're completely self regulated and answerable to no one and yet still holds a massive degree of power over what is seen as "acceptable" content via deals with huge chain stores that won't stock a game unless it has an ESRB rating.

B: I find the list-like nature of ESRB ratings to be both misleading and easily manipulated by savvy developers. This results in developers being able to do what they want providing they avoid a few bullet points (no blood, no decapitations etc). While I don't expect every parent to play each and every game their child plays they should be watching, if not playing, some of the game to check for context and to discuss the issues raised by the game afterwards. Film ratings boards have a similar, easily manipulated system. For a good example, look how with some clever editing The Dark Knight managed to sail through with a PG12 rating despite a scene where the Joker jams a pencil into someone's eye socket.

C: I find "the F-word" and or F**K (look how friendly those asterisks are!) and variants thereof kind of ridiculous. But that's just a pet peeve.

Edit: Oh and to answer your point in the end of the first paragraph. About how the ratings have no bearing on people our age. I wish that were true. Being bumped into a higher age bracket has a notable effect on sales and many publishers will make drastic changes to their titles to avoid being bumped into the 15+ or dreaded AO ratings. That`s certainly not the ESRB`s fault (in fact that`s ALL about sleazy devs and publishers) but it illustrates how their policies are indirectly controlling the content in games. Throw in the fact there`s a different ratings group with a different set of standards in each and every major market and suddenly developers are on very shaky ground.

I love the design and pose of the lady sipping out of the Unicorn cup. It's soooooo cute!

Grey Carter:
C: I find "the F-word" and or F**K (look how friendly those asterisks are!) and variants thereof kind of ridiculous. But that's just a pet peeve.

To be fair, using "the F-word" is considered vulgar. I prefer to reserve the use of the actual word for times when it is appropriate, such as great emotional stress or intense anger. Otherwise, the word loses all meaning. It's really already happening, if you just listen to casual conversation, and every third of fourth word is "fuck" said without cause, purposeless. Like Steven Fry, I don't agree that all people who use that word are not as intelligent, but I do believe that who use it all the time will destroy it's expressiveness. Maybe I'm just an old fogy fighting the natural evolution of language, but I don't like it. one so far. Maybe because we have been fed a diet lacking in funny for the past several weeks. Who couldn't be that funny at all.

Keeping homage to the slowbros in the comic. Me like.

Well I suppose they can't just come out and write on the review "Says Fuck a lot.", but writing "Says the F word a lot." does seem a little bit child like. Oh well, what are you gona do?

Hehehe...Yeah, Bulletstorm does have a bit of a dick joke stick. Which doesn't stop it from being outright hilarious mind. And it could really use more cleavage.

Don't get me wrong I enjoyed Children of Steam and God Emperor of Steam but I am glad to see the normal comic is back. Keep up the good work!

The other F-Word? It says.... it says...

I would be tempted to join the ESRB, just so I could wear that hat to work.

Seriously, I love those propellor beanies.

Ahaha that's awesome.

Art style is coming along well, and I found this comic sufficiently amusing to turn my laptop and show someone else. I hope you know what that means, coming from me.

Yeah, insult people for doing their fucking job and putting the ratings on their site, and choosing not to swear because it's beneath them. Fuck them so hard, how dare they rate games like movies are rated. [/sarcasm]


Are you guys kidding me? No one picked up on the Dr. Frankenfurter reference in the one-liner at the bottom? I have lost all faith in you guys

I was about to say the same, but we can affirm each others faith in humanity. It's the Transylvanian Way.

... <3

Now make an OFLC (Aus) one, that would be a laugh.

Wow this comic was really offensive. We need to censor it more!

Very true.
Also, I like how you drew Erin in this comic. Pretty.

Who Dares Wins:
Really awesome, it's exactly like that, I always laugh when I read them. And may I notice the art improvement, too?

I think Stout's hair 'looks' longer...
Would vomited "fire" be solid in composition, like molten rock, or would it be unbound by gravity and gaseous in form, like, ya know, fire?

... it's still nowhere near as bad as Australia. If the ESRB are all six-year-olds, then the Australian ratings people are probably still in the womb... :P

That Wii sexy spanking game you can't buy in the US, is rated PG (as in suitable for children 8+) in Australia.
So, yeah...

I don't get the fuss about ESRB ratings at all. I thought ratings where still voluntary in the US. Its illegal to sell to those outside the ratings in Australia.

That was hilarious. I love it.

And yet somehow their office place doesn't look so bad. I kinda like the idea that there's a place out there where a man can go to work and play with a truck and drink from a crazy straw. Call me crazy. Call me a straw.

Also I dunno, some of the ESRB write-ups like the one for DOA paradise have been pretty good reading.

Are we talking about the same ESRB? Because the one I know writes ratings like a coroner reporting on a child tortured to death. 'It is possible to kill enemies by kicking them, during which their entrails fly out. Large splatches of blood and gore are seen in this moment. In this situations the character will often provide verbal encouragement in the form of small concise expressions. Foul language is common in these expressions.' Etc.

Here's a hint: if your joke is 'the ESRB either is or is talking to 6-year-olds', the resolution is 'they are talking to 6-year-olds'. The people who care about ratings do care about the usage of the f-word, like it or not.

I suppose you'd prefer the writeups to be 'you can kick a guy in the NUTS and bloods FLY OUT and it's TOTALLY AWESOME you can trust me on there because Chad was there and he ALMOST VOMITED it's so fucking cool'. I warn you, if they were like this they'd stop being funny much earlier.

The ESRB somehow missed "Ejeculation"

I refuse to patch the game though

Hilarious, the art's looking very stylish as well! :D

P.S. Unicorn cup with a twisty straw!

i also enjoy the fact that Tomas the Tank-engine and a T-rex are friends, because obviously they wouldn't have them to be fighting.
Also I like that long hair is written under "things we don't like."

"Help, I'm stuck in a dick joke factory" is one of the best lines this comic's had for a while.

Although most ESRB writeups I've seen have avoided that. Ast*risks seem like a popular way to censor words that might prove unpleasant to small, undeveloped ears.

Excellent. The names of those last two skillshots were actually pretty clever too.

Looks like Erin turned into a Girl again while I wasn't looking.

Y'know, it's so easy to rip on the ESRB because they're the big mean ol' censor. But when Uncle Sam comes knocking and suggesting laws to control the industry, gamers fall all over themselves pointing out that we already have this fantastic regulatory body, and it does its job pretty damned admirably.

Looks like it's back to business-as-usual. Good. I liked the Steam arc, but I'm glad it's overwith.

All those "don't likes" in the last frame insult me, especially the long hair one.
Also this art style is awesome! I want to see it in an animation.

Why the hell are they called captchas?... AND they're called challenges!?

Frozen Donkey Wheel2:
Personally, I think the whole concept of "swear words" is just ridiculous. I mean, the only reason these words are considered "more offensive" then others is because WE'RE NOT ALLOWED TO SAY THEM. It's a paradox. Also, no one should ever say "F you!" Clearly if you aren't willing to swear, you don't have any strong feelings on the matter, and you probably didn't need to say anything in the first place.

What? Oh, right. Uh...Good comic. Actually, to honest, one of the few I've actually laughed at, so....One of the best, I suppose.

swear words are swear words because when you call someone a pusinfested dick, you're comparing him to, well, a pus infested dick. And as puritanical as we secretly are, a dick is a nasty thing, used for the ungodly act of sex! YUK!

The sex related ones are offensive out of tradition.

As much as I enjoyed the comic and I agree about making fun of the ESRB, and my tongue's pretty goddamn loose when I'm with the right friends..

.. dicktits? As fun as it sounds, I feel like I have to be 13 again to enjoy that sort of funny shit for more than half an hour at a time >.>

either way, I'm still laughing at the "dick joke factory" part, that was a pretty good one

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