Zero Punctuation: The Legend of Zelda: Skyward Sword

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Well, I still loved Skyward Sword, but after all the waiting it doesn't feel like it's better then Twilight Princess. You'd think that the biggest Nintendo release of the year would have a bit more kick.

Maybe all the hype got me expecting too much.

"I'm not a harp player but I'm pretty sure there's more to that." Haha.

And my God, I never thought I'd encounter a video game character that's more of a Captain Obvious than Fuuka from Persona 3.

I dunno. Navi was practically General Obvious in Ocarina of Time.

I think Midna in Twilight Princess was as good as these "support characters" have ever been in Zelda since she had a personality and motives, rather then just being a chatty tutorial.

Definitely a spot on review. I bought the game much more optimistically, hoping it would right the wrong that is Twilight Princess. While I think it's better than Twilight Princess, it's a matter of having a few higher highs. The rest is made up of lower lows. The bludgeon-you-over-the-head-with-motion-controls thing got annoying fast and didn't really go anywhere. And Fi alone drags the game down several grades and circles of hell. "LOOK WE ARE IN A FOREST SO 90% CHANCE THAT THERE'S VEGETATION WHICH MUST MEAN THAT THERE'S WATER NEARBY." No shit. Also, as Yahtzee pointed out, that invariable text speed is bullshit. Plus, when you finally do need advice, you have to trudge through a "YOU ARE NOW LOW ON HEALTH. 89% CHANCE THAT YOU NEED TO NOT BE LOW ON HEALTH." schitck before you can inquire.

Also, there are tons of control issues without even mentioning the Wiimote. What the fuck happened with taking out and putting away items? Press A to put away sword. Press B to take out item. Press B to put away item. Press A to use item. This is not a logical progression and doesn't even make design sense considering every other Zelda game seemed to get it right. Also, the stamina bar. When I'm running away from enemies THERE'S A 69% CHANCE I don't want to run up a fucking wall.

That said, I enjoyed certain bits quite a lot. The pirate ship was cool and I really loved the fourth dungeon boss. Plus the art design is my favorite of any 3D Zelda game, so there's that, too.

I'm currently playing Skyward Sword as well and I'm enjoying it so far. I agree on the point that world exploration isn't as expansive as it was in Wind Waker. However, using the Wii remote to fly, handle the beetle and solve the boss keys are nice additions. Plus, like with No More Heroes there is just sense of satisfaction when you use the Wii remote to finish an enemy. Still hard to disagree with the review.

Still hating this new layout.... this was so hard to find...

Obligatory: Great as usual...

Can we fix the layout now?

Big yellow box, front page, top left corner, same as its always been. In fact, the box is bigger than it was before. There has always been a delay of a few minutes of the link appearing elsewhere on the site before it does on the main page.


Still hating this new layout.... this was so hard to find...

You couldn't have been looking very hard then. I came on the main page and it was the first thing I saw, and I wasn't even looking for it.

The fact that I got the first post, 9 minutes in, on a ZP video, no less, should show how "easy" it was to find.

I did agree with a lot of his points. The sky was empty compared to the Great Sea, the 3 boss battles against the Imprisoned was unneeded, and while I don't think it was nearly as padded as he says, the quest for the Song of the Hero was the most padded piece of padding in a game I've played in a long time (Fuck you Water Dragon!).

That being said, I still loved the game. The combat was good and responsive, the puzzles were some of the best in the series, and most of the little tweaks were well appreciated (radial menu, stamina bar, ect.) The story was pretty good, and really, the only time I minded the fact that there were only three areas to explore was during the Song of the Hero thing, because every other time you were going to a new part of that area.

The game was a little longer than it should have been, and the bird-riding was really pointless except for one point in the game, but I think the good far outweighed the bad. Great video, funny as always.

Nintendo doesn't care what you think...

I'm pretty sure that Nintendo, just like any software company, cares what their customers think, it's just that whoever has criticism has no idea how to properly state it, and thus get ignored. Now is the perfect example: anyone that has played Zelda, including those that made the games, knows that not every game is 'exactly the same,' so when someone criticizes the series for that, why should they feel the need to listen to that person?

The closest I've seen to actual criticism was a 10 point list by a Kotaku editor on things that Skyward Sword fell short in, but titled it "10 Stupid Things Terribly Wrong with The Legend of Zelda: Skyward Sword", and then proceeded to write the article in a way solely to incite nerdrage. The writer admitted that it was just supposed to be all in good fun and I agreed with most of his points, but fact of the matter is, the way he wrote that article is not going to make any of the fans of the game, nor Nintendo itself, agree with what he was trying to say.

I think it would be more apparent that Nintendo, and any other game company at that, would be willing to listen to fan and critic feedback if they acted with more class over it. There are a lot of areas that Skyward Sword can improve in, but who is Nintendo going to listen to: the fans claiming it's probably the best Zelda game ever made, or those that say it's a bad game because it's exactly the same as every other Zelda game?

.... <_< >_> 0_0 I DISAGREE BUT I RESPECT YOUR OPINION! Yes I loved the game, yes I'm a Zelda fanboy, yes the game has its moments that annoy me but its supposed to be, the Zelda games are like abusive husbands or wives, I always come back for more. OK that went out poorly.

Yes Fi is annoying, so much so that she should take an arrow to the knee. YOU SEE HOW ANNOYING THAT JOKE IS?! FI ISN'T AS BAD AS THAT!

But again, I digress. Still loved this review because what I come here for is to see Yahtzee rip apart my favourite games. BUT, yes Zelda games reuse the same shit but it is NEVER as bad as Call of Duty.

BUT, AGAIN I DIGRESS! Still I'm surprised Yahtzee didn't complain about Dowsing or centering the cursor. Well I'm off to play it some more even though I should pay Okami attention. Why have I not played much of Okami you ask? Maybe its because its too Japanese for me. But isn't Nintendo Japanese? ................ Hypocrite for the WIN!


stun/electric prods? like in Dead Rising 2: OTR and it's time-paradox downloadable predecessor?
stepping in water waking up monsters? like in Amnesia: The Dark Descent?
forest, desert, and volcano dungeons and crawling text designed only for new players? like in EVERY SINGLE 3D ZELDA GAME BEFORE?

It's a good thing I dismissed the "OOH, LOOK! Swing the Wiimote in a certain direction like this is a Wii Sports title!" and "OOH, LOOK! You can collect bugs and stuff to upgrade your weapons along with your wallet!" trailers. The main villain looks interesting, and Susan Arendt showed that he reads (as in still no voice, just text) interesting, but I can watch Youtube cutscene compilations for that.

"I've found a plot hole! NURSE!"

Wonder who Yahtzee's nurse is? Jim Sterling maybe? Cause that would be funny as hell.

I want to say something that comes out as, "I knew Yahtzee would have given a great big 'meh' toward it," and not come off like a smug jackass, but I realized that such is impossible. As far as I care, let him tear Zelda to pieces, I honestly do not care. If I wanted to pick up a Zelda game, I would and I would judge it on my opinion instead of his. The fanboys do that and it seems to work out well for them. Even so, I see where Yahtzee is coming from on this, Link is near-totally devoid of personality, Zelda is barely any better, Ganondorf doesn't seem to have any real motivation besides, "he's evil," and the games tend to be pretty paint-by-numbers. Does that mean the games can't be fun? Not at all.

Normally I laugh along with Yahtzee's rants on the latest games, but it's quite sad when everything he says completely matches everything I've experienced when playing the game.

Skyward Sword was a step back for the Zelda series in my opinion and the fact that Nintendo have stated that this is the direction they're looking to take for future Zelda games is worrying indeed.


Then which one is the worst?

Aside from the CDi versions? Well, in my personal opinion, Wind Waker. Was pretty fun for a bit, but got frustrating to play around the halfway mark looking for those gems.

Like I said, though, I've only ever played 2 Zelda games, so my opinion on the franchise means shit, at least until I try out Skyward Sword and get OoT for the 3DS.

'Hitchhikers may be escaping patients'- I'm sure that's a reference to one of Halo's chapter titles that pop up during levels. That or an unintended conincidence.

I think this wasn't just a critique of SS, it was a critique of how Nintendo worship Nintendo to the death and think Miyamoto is a God, granted Nintendo and Miyamoto had a huge impact on this industry but come one !



Still hating this new layout.... this was so hard to find...

You couldn't have been looking very hard then. I came on the main page and it was the first thing I saw, and I wasn't even looking for it.

The fact that I got the first post, 9 minutes in, on a ZP video, no less, should show how "easy" it was to find.

I have a hard time seeing how that was hard to find.

For those talking about Yahtzee calling it the worse Zelda game ever, I think you misheard him. He called it the worst Zelda game -he's ever played- which, considering the little graph he showed, is about 5. And aside from Phantom Hourglass (which I haven't played), I'd pretty much agree with his comparison to those other games.

Yahtzee has a good habit of summarizing all my criticisms of a game (albeit not mentioning some positive things I find) in one concise video. This review did not disappoint. The combat system as a whole took a considerable step back from WW and TP, largely due to the game's fetish for motion controls. The dungeons were shortened and time was replaced by continual returns to the three areas, which felt a whole lot like padding. Fi was a terrible helper, and made me miss Midna like no other. The fights with the Imprisoned were stupid and annoying, so of course they had to make us do them three times.

Of course there were things I really enjoyed about the game (good puzzles and while it didn't work out all the time, I liked the fact that they tried something new with the item system and the dungeon items), but this felt like more of a slog than TP did, which in turn felt like more of a slog than WW did, which in turn felt like more of a slog (well, mainly just ONE part of the game--you know which) than OOT did.

Know what's even worse? I missed Navi after I played SS.

This will probably never happen as there are about a zillion more popular games in recent and upcoming releases, but I would love to hear his take on Metal Gear Solid: HD Collection.

I actually really like the game. I can kinda agree that the game does seem to be a bit padded out by the time I have to search for the different parts of the Song of the Hero though. Plus the multiple fights against the Imprisoned were just annoying.

I liked the rest of the game though, I felt it's one of the better Zelda games I've played. The motion controls are really good and made combat very fun and interesting. And the orchestrated soundtrack is absolutely beautiful.

This game has also somewhat changed my opinion on motion controls. If they can be this good, then maybe there could be a future for them.


BUT, yes Zelda games reuse the same shit but it is NEVER as bad as Call of Duty.

Oh Christ, it's this again.


Look, both games re-use a lot. O.K.? No game is "worse" or "better" than another for it. They're just games that re-use. Don't fight over it.

What an awesome vid to start the day(yea I just woke up 30min ago!).

Thanks Mr.Croshaw for this and have a Merry Christmas!*

*And that goes to every other escapist.

'Hitchhikers may be escaping patients'- I'm sure that's a reference to one of Halo's chapter titles that pop up during levels. That or an unintended conincidence.

It's at the start of Arkham Asylum...

(Though it may be in Halo too. I dunno.)

It's in like the 1st minute or so.

I'll just give my opinion then, since displaying your opinion on things seems to be what people are supposed to do on the internet:

- Yes, all your points are valid.
- Yes, it's not as good as The Windwaker or MM or OoT for that matter.
- It does have some aspects that are great improvements to the Zelda 'formula' though; especially the motion controls. Not only does it work (no really, it does) but it also made fighting regular baddies truly fun and satisfying, and the same can be said about a lot of items. The whip was useful in tww, but now it suddenly scores high on your 'grafitication' scale as well.
- The dungeons and most bosses are not revolutionary, but they can definitely be counted among the best of the series. Which means they're about as good it gets.
- The overall quality is just very high. People tend to forget to mention this in reviews, since it's the case for about all Zeldas, but that doesn't make it less true.
- Not 'essential' but still worth mentioning: the game and its art style are gorgeous.

Overall, does this make Skyward Sword a brilliant 3d Zelda? No, it only beats Twilight Princess. And does this game allow lots of frowning for still using the same mechanics it used 15 years ago? It's justifiable, but sure, go ahead. However, does this make Skyward Sword not one of the best games of the last few years? Certainly not.

A few points were accurate (like not having much to explore in the sky), but most criticisms were pretty off. Good thing these aren't meant to be taken seriously.



You couldn't have been looking very hard then. I came on the main page and it was the first thing I saw, and I wasn't even looking for it.

The fact that I got the first post, 9 minutes in, on a ZP video, no less, should show how "easy" it was to find.

I have a hard time seeing how that was hard to find.

Yes, but videos take a while to show up on the front page, and slightly older videos are bunched on the front page with the other new content. Finding even older videos requires digging into the entire set by a tab instead of a list of shows that has a "newest episode" link for each.
Also, the site is now really slow.

I really really enjoyed the game. I thought the motion controls worked well, and the soundtrack and visuals look awesome.

That being said, I do agree that there's not enough stuff to do in the sky. I didn't enjoy the vast world of Wind Waker because it took five days of sailing to get anywhere, but I just wish there could be a happy medium.

Also, I thought the bosses that don't involve you using the dungeon's item were supposed to be a good thing? Because everyone complains that "enter dungeon, get item, use on boss" is too samey? Well, which way do you want it, Yahtzee?!

Anyways, I actually liked this a lot more than Twilight Princess, because it's more challenging. The dungeons and monsters in TP were a cake walk for me, and in SS I find myself actually getting stuck and having to think about it, and (gasp) actually have to use my health potions and stuff because the fights were challenging.

I wish the lyre wasn't terrible. I would actually really love the lyre, if you played it like a real instrument. I didn't mind going back to the same three areas again, because they felt huge to me, like I could spend the entire game there and never find everything, and when you go back for the sacred flames the bulk of it doesn't take place in the same area, it takes place in a different area connected the first one. Also, the surface world areas actually involved puzzles, instead of a giant field that you have to run across to pad the game.

The Silent Realm sections were fun. They took the boring tears section from Twilight Princess and made it exciting, and they took the Phantom idea from Phantom Hourglass/Spirit Tracks which I liked.

My main complaint is that at least the first half of the game feels directionless to me. Like I get that I have to go through these temples, but it's never really explained why, except "go find Zelda, go find Zelda". So I go through three dungeons trying to play catch up with Zelda, who doesn't even need me because she can bypass the entire dungeon, and she has Impa around.

Also, for the worst Zelda game I've played? Phantom Hourglass, hands down. Especially because of the stupid Temple of the Ocean King. Whoever thought that was a good idea needs to be punched.

I'm playing this right now actually. My main issue are the controls, they are absolutely miserable, I failed the parachute landing at the start about 30 times and took about 15 minutes to catch the golden bird thing, while my sword seems to misinterpret my moves. I move my wiimote from its default position to the right in order to later perform a right slash, but the game performs a left slash because I moved the bloody thing and then when I actually do the move I intend to it doesn't register. It's frustrating as hell. Also the cursor constantly needs recalibration and centering midgame, and the worst part is that you don't even realize it's happening most of the time. I was trying to aim my sword to the sky for a good 2 minutes before I realized that just pointing the wiimote straight up didn't do shit so something was wrong. Recentering fixed it, but then it got fucked again.

Also, the graphics are atrocious, for a Wii, PS2 or late PS1 game. Seriously, what the fuck. Not only are they blocky, blurry and jaggy, they also lack detail. Not texture detail, environment detail. Flair. They are bland. Everything's pretty much empty. Why? What's their excuse? Are the cel-shady faces supposed to make up for that if you are a Zelda fanboy? Fucking God of War 1 looks a generation ahead of this game. That is inexcusable.

As for the dungeons and gameplay, looks good so far. Looks Zelda, as always. Gonna have some fun with them. But seriously, Nintendo need to really, really step up their game with their core franchises. Nostalgia only goes so far, especially if the games feel lazily designed. And usually they don't, but this one does. It hasn't made me give up on it, but I will very hesitant to pick up another Zelda game in the future, unless they really start mixing things up.

Skyward Sword the worst you've ever played? Yeah I think you just proved how much of a non-critic and biased chode you are Croshaw. Go back and play Phantom Hourglass again because that's more of a fuck up by Nintendo than this.

Nintendo tried to change up the formula for once for Skyward Sword a bit to try and keep Yahtzee from trying to use that dried up turd of a flawed argument known as "every Zelda game is the same" and he considers it the worst title because of that? If this doesn't prove to you people that Yahtzee is a biased pretentious self-righteous asshole that cannot give Nintendo credit where credit is due, then there's no helping the gaming community in the future.

Way to fuck up my holiday Yahtzee. The one game I wanted you to completely ignore and you couldn't even do that. Someone ought to force you to play the CDi games as punishment for this. There's having an opinion, and then there's being a closeted hater. Guess which category you fall under?

I'm about ready to hit my breaking point with this guy.

Seriously pal, why didn't you just make a tearful YT Video on the subject?

''Why won't bad Mr. Yahtzee praise Nintendo for nothing like MovieBob does!?''

Review was funny, I heard it was better, but meh, Yahtzee doesn't like much of anything anyway. Actually, kind of makes you wonder how a guy like that ever got into gaming xD

Yahtzee: "It's bad because it's the same as the previous games."
Yahtzee 2 minutes later: "It's bad because it's not like in the previous games."

Well Yahtzee, decide. You can't hate the game because it's "the same as previous" and then later say it's bad because it's different. (talking about using items found in dungeons against bosses of those dungeons).

I didn't have the problem with the responding of the motion controls. It worked really fine.

The harp was lacking compared to the previous instruments. a no brainer.
But you ignored the great music. You didn't say how good the music is? Why? Ignoring the good parts of the game just to make a bad review?

Skyward Sword has only 3 regions, but those 3 regions are bigger than any previous Zelda game.
Well, not really bigger in the sense of just the terrain size, but bigger in the sense of content. The "big" worlds of the previous Zelda games where mostly empty spaces. Wind Waker sea, Ocarina of Time was HUGE, but it was really empty. The main area which is bigger than the newest CoD was empty. It had only the entrances to the other areas and the Lon Lon farm.

Fi was indeed annoying. "I calculated x%..." was indeed annoying, but I think that was Nintendo's intention. She had to look as artificial as possible. That way of talking fits her perfectly. The only really annoying thing that I found about her was that she basically solves the puzzles for you. but even with her I've seen people having problems with the dungeons.

Did you mention how well designed the dungeons are? No? Why? To make the review worse?

Did you mention the new art style? Did you say how good the game looks on the Wii? No?
You're the one complaining that the only games selling are gray/brown shooter games jet you say for a game that is great and refreshing compared to the games that came out in the last 4 years.

When someone watches your review of any FPS game, they would say that any Zelda game except Twilight Princess would get a 11 out of 10. Then there comes a Zelda game and the review is worse than of the BF3 vs CoD review.

I'm NOT butthurt because this is a Zelda game. I enjoyed it and I don't care what other say. I'm butthurt because with all the FPS shit coming out any non-fps game that is just above average should be praised. Yahtzee, you have a big influence on the gaming community. People who aren't part of the escapist community come here just to watch your reviews. instead of stomping every potential nonFPS game into the ground, try at least to give a semi-positive review even if they don't really deserve it. You CAN change the opinion of a big part of the online community. You could do it for the better.

If someone watched several of your latest reviews, he would go buy BF 3 and CoD MW3 while ignoring any other semi-decent game.

Also, I thought the bosses that don't involve you using the dungeon's item were supposed to be a good thing? Because everyone complains that "enter dungeon, get item, use on boss" is too samey? Well, which way do you want it, Yahtzee?!

I think it's easier to say that he just wants the franchise in general to die. See this is why I come in hear and call him out on his bullcrap (or complain, depending on your point of view) every time he reviews a Nintendo game. Let's ignore the fact that I am myself a Nintendo fan for a second, okay? That doesn't change the fact that his hatred of the company is getting old and isn't funny any more and just making him look more and more like a self-righteous Nintendo hater and I think it's bad enough that the Sony fanbase is full of those idiots as is.

I think it's better that if Yahtzee can't give the company credit where credit is due, then he should keep his opinion on it to himself and just not review Nintendo games anymore.

This was easily one of my favorite episodes, even though I personally loved pretty much everything about Skyward Sword. But to be honest I thought Yahtzee was gonna hate this one :P

No fair complaining how Zelda games are all the same, and then expressing extreme shock that a recurring boss, get this, DOES NOT CARE ABOUT THE DUNGEON ITEM, then going on to imply that its worse for not sticking to the formula. Please try to stay consistent in a review in future. Also, your bias against motion controls loomed on the horizon like a particularly petulant storm cloud, and the mentioned delay is much less of a problem than you think, particularly while you're playing it. Most everything else was pretty good, except for the order of the MacGuffins:

"I FOUND A PLOT HOLE! NURSE!" left me in stitches (esp. since it's all true), Fi's probabilities are annoying but she's a limp biscuit in terms of personality otherwise, and haven't played past the 6th dungeon.

I had to watch this several times, because i fell off my chair laughing every time he went:
"I've found a plot hole!!! NURSE!!!!!!"

Freaking Hilarious XD

"I found a plot hole. NURRRRRRRSSSSSE!!!!"

OMG!! I think I died laughing right there. That came outta nowhere.

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