Zero Punctuation: Risen 2: Dark Waters

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Risen 2: Dark Waters

This week, Zero Punctuation reviews Risen 2: Dark Waters.

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The game got a dodge and animal block patch. It's still mildly unplayable. I have no idea how people managed to play it before the patch.
The game so far is sorely disappointing me. Really high hopes for it, really liked Risen 1.

Pirate on shoulder stat? Awesome. Also, the Half Life part, freaking hilarious.

Should show Yahtzee Revelations 2012, that should get a great blast of vile from him because that game is utter shit.

HO-LLY-SHIT! Did I just witness the return of 'Intro Sequence Theatre'?
I think we might just be...

puts on sunglasses

...At World's End!

That's a shame. I was hoping this game was going to be good. I suppose I should've known better, after playing the first one, but hope springs eternal (don't play the first, btw).

RPG Pirate Game? More like ARGGHHH-Pee-Gee


Ha I like the Kony2012 stab you places throughtout the video. Also that Half Life voice over at the end seen abit random. While it is funny but are you promoting something or is it a one off thing? Still I would like to see you collaborate with Scott from Accused Farm (aka creator of Freeman Mind).

So did Yahtzee make a mod for HL or Portal or something? WTF was that? It was hilarious.
"Stop banging on the door, we know you're out there we just don't like you."

"Playing the hits while you play god"

Cool, nice to see a return of the over dubbing in games, nice pick for the music playing in the background as well. X3

Just btw. you have to block, when you want you're character to kick.
And yes i know yathzee will probably not read this, i just want to say it nevertheless.

Good stuff as usual Yahtzee, and the Half Life bit at the end was great. Was a bit surprised I didn't see a Lone Survivor review this week though. Figured you'd be all over that game and have a review up by now.

Ah, the lovely return of the post-feature gag. How I missed ye.

Loved the little Half Life sketch at the end!

I must admit, I have been tempted by Dark Waters and its piratey goodness, and this review hasn't turned me off it. It's definitely a steam sale purchase for me.

Anyway, that's not why I'm commenting. You stated the name of the band behind that awesome 'I am a scientist' song, that I heard on Brainiac years ago. Thank you. Now I know what it's called and was able to look it up. You rule. (and the whole half life scene was pretty damned funny too).

Review was great and all, but don't care. Half-Life radio jockey overshadowed it. More please.

Loved the bit at the end. Too funny!

Absolutely loved the Half Life bit at the end, especially the part where he goes: "To whomever is putting bowties on the test subjects, please stop doing that. Humanizing them makes the dissection... difficult."


Oh yeah, nice review!

Yeah, I am a scientist.

I love the little end of review skits. More please!

HUZZAHH! the return of after video shorts.

It didn't seem appealing before watching this and now it seems less so. Good show.

Also, yes! More more video shorts!

De Montford University hahahaha.

That made me laugh so much.

You would think making a pirate themed rpg would be easy but no still managed to mess it up.


Sector 7G is where Homer Simpson works isn't it? Explains a lot about Black Mesa :p

"Playing the hits while you play God!"

Yahtzee, you magnificent bastard. Planning on doing more like this/

It's too bad the mechanics sound so bad. There do need to be more RPGs that aren't in a medieval setting (elves and dwarves are just fine in the Industrial Revolution, for example). For me, a lack of character customization in an RPG is a deal-breaker.

The Black Mesa radio show was hilarious.

First time I've commented on a ZP video in a long time, but that ending bit was awesome.

Review was great and all, but don't care. Half-Life radio jockey overshadowed it. More please.

This, just all of this!

...mmn? Oh, yes, err, pirate RPG, right, umm, well, haven't played Risen 1, so I don't think I'll bother, but I'll definitely have some more of that Half Life stuff please!

Too bad about the pirates game; the rpg market seems to be getting bogged down by an overall lack of new ideas lately.

The half-life sequence was amazing.

The Artificially Prolonged:
The Black Mesa radio show was hilarious.

I was in stitches.

So so funny.

arrr great episode as always me hearty

Sounds every bit as awkward as the first. I did play the first the whole way through, once and with a guide after leveling in such a way that I was screwed the first time I tried, a couple of mods helped it a tiny bit graphically but didn't really change the gameplay which sounds a lot like this. I know their budget isn't huge and that excuses the graphics, but their combat and leveling system does need an overhaul of some sort if they ever want to reach a wider audience. Right now combat is just broken and leveling puts too much focus on cash, and from the sounds of it certain skills are imbalanced to the point of being indispensable or utterly useless, and you don't necessarily know which is which without a guide or blowing a huge chunk of change and possible working yourself into a hole you can't climb out of when the enemies scale up.

No interest in the game whatsoever, but the post-credits gag was totally worth it. It helps that I'm playing Half-Life for the first time now.

Great ending Yahtzee. Some game developer really does need to hire you as a writer/ voice actor for their games.

A neat idea, but terrible execution, I see.
That's unfortunate, I hoped it may be good.

On a different note:
Ben's reviewing and game assessing skills are still as good as always, but it seems his humour is slowly being reduced to "It's X. Like [insert gross/funny comparison]".

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