Zero Punctuation: Burnout: Paradise Pages 1 2 3 4 5 NEXT | |
This week on Zero Punctuation, Yahtzee takes Burnout: Paradise for a spin. | |
A nice review indeed, now don't ban me because I posted this... Car games don't really interest me a little bit so I just stay away from them. EDIT: Didn't you guys noticed that a car was sounding in the background when Yahtzee was talking of the camera angles when you crash? | |
Six steps closer to Albuquerque, I salute you. | |
I also wondered about the fact that the only life-form you ever actually see any sign of is Atomica. I hated that there was NO ONE in your car if you broke out the windshield to look inside of it. Though, you know you could have adjusted the view if you didn't like the default, which I saw you noted at the end. I found the default camera much better so you can judge if you will be able to squeeze past somewhere or if you can turn sharper or something. Also, I really enjoyed it just because of how smoothly it ran at those insane speeds. I am really not a fan of most racing games, but it felt enough like Midnight Club 3 that I bought it. Also, you better have it on 360 so you can listen to your own in-game music, because the game's soundtrack is pretty bad. Avril Lavigne? Hell no! | |
The UK now hates you, I think. | |
Good review... as always... I think it's nice they brought DJ Atomica back, he was kinda fun in SSX 3. | |
Wow he seems a bit agitated this week. He is probably still feeling the feedback from DMC4 I guess | |
nice review... but car games are like sports games... and i dislike both | |
Hmmm this part of the UK is in favour, I'd have preferred just crashing spectacularly in a boring set-up way. | |
Car games are ok but Grand Trismo will always be my no.1 car game oh yea Great Review | |
Racing games are all the same to me and like MMORPGs i play one once a few years. I haven't gotten my driver's license yet either, we are less sheep than the rest i would say. I would love to see how you would rated a true AAA game like GTA3 or what you would consider one | |
Two things I absolutely expected to be mentioned : 1) That the new crash mode sucks harder than Linda Lovelace and they should have kept the old one. 2) That far from being merely like GTA, it's nearly identical to Test Drive Unlimited. Yahtzee you tifter wearing stud. What happened to the apt game comparisons? GTA. Pah. Still the most accurate reviews on the net though. | |
Another masterpiece! And Baileys makes me to yuck! | |
that was pretty fucking straight forward and true i could not find the right way to the finish line if i had my own map drilled to my forhead | |
As a sidenote, the only track i saw that came from a guitar hero game was My Curse by Killswitch Engage. | |
Lol... Great review you Huculiran-examplar! BTW when are you going to continue your Trilby and Chris comics??? They never ended | |
I take my "what is there to review in a racing game" back, this review is up there with the best ones. P.S. Yahtzee, you calypgian superman, you've finally updated your site with new content?! | |
So what do you look for in games, apart from learning something? evidently you like half life, which i can only assume if for the story telling and art...and i can only hope its not for the repetitive and thoughtless gameplay design or the mind boggingly challenging see-saw puzzles. I had a quick go on your art of theft game and thought the idea had potential; basicaly stealth puzzles but quit after the first level because i found it boring, and poorly implemented, no doubt i stand alone on that. your dismissal of halo along with your love of silent hill lead me to beleive you do not enjoy intelligent gameplay, halo being one of the few games with solid and balanced gameplay, allowing for almost infinate replayability, and no it doesnt have a good story; neither does chess. | |
Best review for Paradise I've seen :) So true, I mean, it's fun for a bit - but the small things do end up getting in the way - dead on, Yahtzee. | |
Amen My brother. I love racing games, and Gran Turismo is my crack cocaine. I am suffering withdrawals even now because after four years, my PS2 finally shit the bed. Ironically, I don't care for street racing games as much because they do lack a little in the reality department. Good stuff, but still usually leave me feeling like I sullied myself by playing them. Need for speed is probably the worst in the physics department. I once watched a guy take a 90 degree corner at 150 Miles Per Hour, then complain that the guy doing an oil change on my car staying under my car on Gran Turismo was unrealistic. The second most accurate physics in a game, and the guy not popping the hood is his complaint. Shows what he knows about cars. I am surprised he didn't say something about the guy crawling under the back of my Lotus Esprit to change the oil... | |
well that is a very general view. We are a diverse people and all free to our own opinion im sures some people don't like him but im sure sume do. | |
HA! Breaks Flow! Dammit Yahtzee, I was taking a drink when you said that and I sqirted it all over my monitor. | |
I count 3 songs that have been in both a Burnout and Guitar Hero game: Stop - Jane's Addiction What do I win? | |
YAY, Carmageddon! Double-YAY, someone else who thinks Burnout Paradise Sucks! Triple- YAY, hatred towards street racing punk fucktards. | |
YESS!!!! Excellent review, Yahtzee! You pretty much summarized the entire series in one game! Keep up the perfect work and keep letting the hatred flow! | |
And a sideways-baseball-cap-wearing transcript:
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Quadruple Yay, The Levellers :-) | |
People race in Burnout? Other than to unlock stuff for the crash modes, I mean. | |
Hilarious throughout, but dont take offense if i say a lot of it seemed to reflect your lack of ability to play driving games. I never use the minimap. After 4+ hours gaming time you should have a decent grasp of the city layout. Besides, for a guy who gives out about lack of innovation frequently, you seems to dislike burnout for being to much against the grain. Different strokes i suppose. | |
i love yahtzee so much...never miss any...and i just LOVE the fact that he used the devotchkas at the end of this one!! | |
Yahtzee you capriciously clever card! You made me spit out my drink! | |
I watched the review even though I haven't played, nor am I particularly interested in racing games. But I have seen games geared toward the the wealthy's indulgences, and not being one, they haven't really held my attention. It's dissapointing that those things exist, but at least we have confirmed it's going on. Maybe I wouldn't have such a positive attitude had I been playing, the droll and numb makes for boring companions. | |
On a sidenote, "Heavenly Sword and Other Stuff" got pushed to page 3 which is currently inaccessible. | |
I only remember "I Wanna Be Sedated" by the Ramones from Guitar Hero and Burnout Takedown. That's because I turned off ALL of the new punk garbage on the Burnout radio station! Every race it was Ramones, start to finish. | |
great review as always Yahtzee, keep them coming | |
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