The Big Picture: Schlocktober 2014: Dragon Wars: D-War

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Schlocktober 2014: Dragon Wars: D-War

This South Korean fantasy action film is something you have to see to believe.

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Wait? Does that film really count as a Halloween sort of movie? It just look an awful fantasy war like film to me.

What a bizarre film, I'm surprised I've never heard of it until now. Shame it isn't on the UK Netflix :-/

IIRC, Bob reviewed this on his old blog way back in 2007 before his critic career took off.

Now I actually want to see it.

I have seen it . Didnt like it.

I thought it was pretty fun when I say it. Granted, I saw it free on demand somewhere and thought it was as cool as the matrix...

Maybe it's not that good now that I think of it.

I don't know what's weirder, that this is the most recent movie to be shown on schlocktober or the fact this movie is not only one I've seen, but payed money to see.

Imagining the good dragon as Shenlong seems to make this movie look like the most awesome 15 minutes of a day. The other part is debatable.

Yeah, i saw this one already. It struck me very much as one of those "movies set in America but made by someone who clearly has little knowledge or understanding of how America actually works" movies.

And the funniest part for me has to be the moment when, as he's watching a giant, mythical dragon constrict around that building, a cop picks up his radio and shouts "We've got a Code Five!!!"

Lord knows what a "Code Six" would be for the LAPD...

Yeah, Apache Longbow helicopters fight from reallllllly far away. Popping in and out of sight.
They do not fly up so close to the tallest building for dozens of miles where a snake monster can bite them to death... :(

Still, I saw that poster going around on the Net back then, and decided to not waste my time.
Looking at your "ten best minutes ever" now I feel entirely justified.

-Insert pervy joke about a war being fought over a D here-

Kenjitsuka:
Yeah, Apache Longbow helicopters fight from reallllllly far away. Popping in and out of sight.
They do not fly up so close to the tallest building for dozens of miles where a snake monster can bite them to death... :(

Still, I saw that poster going around on the Net back then, and decided to not waste my time.
Looking at your "ten best minutes ever" now I feel entirely justified.

To be fair, Apaches sniping dinos with Hellfires from a kilometer away wouldn't be nearly as entertaining as dog fighting them with cannons.

I think Carlyle from the late Spill.com said it best about this film:

"When you make a movie about dragons with missile launchers on their backs and I'm nodding off, you fail as a film maker."

I'm guessing he was asleep during the best ten minutes then.

This was one of the most boring damn movies I have ever had the displeasure of watching. With its premise, how the hell did they manage that?

I actually remember watching this in theaters when it came out. Yeah. This is easily one of the weirdest things to watch. I'd still recommend it though for no other reason than the "what the hell is this" factor.

Oh no... this film.

I would argue this well known, compared at least to the small and odd ball afFair. It's bad, really bad...

...but still... FROG TANKS!

At least Craig Robinson went on to do a better effects film with This Is the End.

06.09 north korea obviously.

Well this movie is certainly something, i don't know or I want to actually watch it or just look up the action scenes online.

I remember this... Sorta. Either it was pretty heavily cut in places or I did my best to forget this movie.

Am I crazy, or do the sound effects from the reptile creatures (they all just sort of blend together to me) sound like what they used for Half-Life's Hunters before the digital processing?

I've seen a film where there are dinosaur riders and there were bigger, fatter dinosaurs with cannons attached...it was on Naboo in Star Wars episode 1! Simply by mentioning that film, I've made that seem a lot less cool.

Oh man, I totally forgot about this movie, and with good reason. As people already mentioned, it somehow manages to be both batshit insane AND really, really boring at the same time, which is not something that is easy to do.

This is one of those unfortunate movies that isn't 'so bad it's good', it's just bad in a non-entertaining way.

Kmadden2004:
Yeah, i saw this one already. It struck me very much as one of those "movies set in America but made by someone who clearly has little knowledge or understanding of how America actually works" movies.

And the funniest part for me has to be the moment when, as he's watching a giant, mythical dragon constrict around that building, a cop picks up his radio and shouts "We've got a Code Five!!!"

Lord knows what a "Code Six" would be for the LAPD...

Wait, the LAPD have a code for that!?

To paraphrase a quote from the John Woo directed movie Broken Arrow "I don't know what's scarier, a giant, mythical dragon constricting around a building, or that it happens so often there's actually a code for it."

OK, Bob. You definitely got my attention on this forgotten film.

I've seen this movie. It is stupidly awesome once the final third's action sequences...

Because apache helicopters VS dragons = the best kind of don't-think-too-deeply-about-it awesome action until Pacific Rim came out.

Scarim Coral:
Wait? Does that film really count as a Halloween sort of movie? It just look an awful fantasy war like film to me.

Eh. Just general horror and/or giant monster movies I think fit his bill for this show. So this counts.

Man I was hyped for this when it first came out, and I've never managed to sit through the whole thing.

The old lady and the fence and The "get hit by a car, get your sword stolen, switch off sword, taser hand, get hit by another car" scenes!

You spoiled all the best bits bob!

Kmadden2004:
Yeah, i saw this one already. It struck me very much as one of those "movies set in America but made by someone who clearly has little knowledge or understanding of how America actually works" movies.

I've always thought of those sorts of films as revenge for all the films Hollywood sets in other countries without understanding how they actually work. ;)

Having lived here all my life, I often find Hollywood depictions of London quite jarring (all major landmarks within twenty feet of each other, random policemen pulling out guns, etc.). Although the funniest not-England I've ever come across is in the anime Hellsing.

Typical monster movie. The viewers waits through an hour and a half or so of dialog and exposition just to get to the part we actually wanted to see, the monsters destroying stuff. Apparently it's impossible to just have 20 minutes of exposition and then 2 hours of monsters destroying stuff.

Kmadden2004:
Yeah, i saw this one already. It struck me very much as one of those "movies set in America but made by someone who clearly has little knowledge or understanding of how America actually works" movies.

And the funniest part for me has to be the moment when, as he's watching a giant, mythical dragon constrict around that building, a cop picks up his radio and shouts "We've got a Code Five!!!"

Lord knows what a "Code Six" would be for the LAPD...

According to Wikipedia: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Los_Angeles_Police_Department_resources

"Code 5: Stakeout, marked police cars must avoid location."

"Code 6: unit has arrived to location, officers investigating"

As far as I can tell, the LAPD doesn't have codes for "Dragon is constricting a building."

I can't believe Thor ripped off Dragon Wars joke about being hit by a car. Despite that though I still didn't enjoy Dragon Wars when it was in theaters. If only they scrapped the whole female sacrifice plot Dragon Wars might've been better.

HOLY SHIT THIS IS SO RAD!!!

Saw Film Brain review it a few years ago and even have a copy myself! (a local rental store was going out of business and it was one of a huge stack of movies I snapped up for cheap)

It's not terrible but it is really boring and more than a little silly for most of the film till near the end when those battle scenes finally happen.

I'm in complete agreement with Bob here. The city battle between human armed forces and the mystical army is one of the most awesome fights in recent movie history- hell, it manages to be more coherent and exciting than the first Transformers movie (the only one I bothered watching) or Terminator: Salvation. My only complaint is that it kinda ends up a curb-stomp battle because "lol, magic armor" > 5.56mm NATO and tank shells.

Unfortunately the movie expects us to sit through a veritable truckload of slow-paced exposition and terribly-done "suspense" to get there. And if you happen to get your hands on this movie, honestly you'll be better of if you just skip right to the battle. You'll be missing out on very little.

Not G. Ivingname:
As far as I can tell, the LAPD doesn't have codes for "Dragon is constricting a building."

Well, they freaking should!

Good to hear the action scenes make up for the weird story and almost nonexistent continuity, and the title delivers on its promise to have DRAGONS FIGHT EACH OTHER! But where the deuce was the "good" dragon through most of the movie?

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