Uncivil War: Quake - Speed Run Finale!

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Yahtzee is the better poet. At least the audience wins.

NOOOOOOOOO! I was rooting for you, Yahtzee! You even had the funniest trash-talk with saying the Fiend "wants to give you a hug". Oh well, I just hope your poem next week will be an epic burn on Jim. Much more that the one I imagine English mustard will give you.

That was tense, I thought Yahtszee would win this one, well done both of you! :D

As for suggestions... play Luftrausers. I don't care what silly rules you come up with, JUST DO IT!.

I wouldn't mind seeing HL2 Episode 2. The final battle against the striders, most striders killed in 10 minutes wins. If not that then hard mode "Where Cubbage Fears to Tread". First to take out the airship wins or match restarts if someone dies and 3 out of 5 deaths is the loser.

In a DrownOut of playing Quake2, and also Hexen I think, Yahtzee said the first rule of jousting Melee enemies is to get them to attack and then step back before the attack registers. ...looks like that cost him the match here tho.

Fiend AI was trickier....infact you took a lot less damage per attack from them just by staying face to face unloading the DBL-barrel. Someone else probably already mentioned it but neither one of them got the hidden Quad Damage right before that tricky part either? *sigh* ...I miss games where even professional critics could die in the first 2 levels of "easy mode". Ya almost never see that anymore.

Aww.. next season it's you two again.
Not bad, I like it, but I was actually hoping for MiracleOfSound vs MovieBob or something.
That seems equally fun.

Well, Yahtzee is going to recite another of his poems that are better than Jim's, so I'm kind of glad he lost!

iller3:
Someone else probably already mentioned it but neither one of them got the hidden Quad Damage right before that tricky part either? *sigh*

Or the Quad damage in the first level with the secret tunnel that lets you skip a little bit ahead... I was honestly trying to reflexively play the game myself as I saw them go through it.

That's good television!

I never knew that 9+9=16... :P
And Yahzee blew it! But basically both have no understanding what "speed running" means. Hint: Running, not shooting!

Also 0/0 ending ... ok, that means we get a new round! What could you do... do a Hearthstone match against each other!?

There are plenty of games that would woke quite well.

Dirt 3: race game.
Skyrim: take the same save game and see who can defeat a dragon the quickest with a realistic dragon mod installed.
Payday 2: perform a heist with the AI the quickest.
Duel each other in Chivalry. First five decapitations win.

Saints Row IV: first one to rack up full notoriety and kill a Warden, all without firing a gun, wins.

Congratulations Sir Sterling! T'was a valiant yet sadly futile effort from Sir Croshaw. Perhaps luck will shine upon him next season?

Artemicion:
I decided to play Quake alongside these two while the video is running. Just so you're both aware: had I actually been a participant in the finale, you'd both be eating mustard. By the time Jimothy made it to the end of the second level, I was on my way up the elevator to the end of the third.

That said, congrats to Jim. As for Yahtzee, well...
image

A+ image usage. Might I suggest for Jim:

image

Geisterkarle:
I never knew that 9+9=16... :P
And Yahzee blew it! But basically both have no understanding what "speed running" means. Hint: Running, not shooting!

Also 0/0 ending ... ok, that means we get a new round! What could you do... do a Hearthstone match against each other!?

There were a couple tied runs, so there wasn't exactly one game for each point :P

Unlucky yahtzee still at least its only mustard. However i would recommend image its what I use whenever a yellow condiment is required. great on a beef sarnie :-).

I want them to do a Dynasty warriors run through (the harder the difficulty the better) and the first person to complete the levels with the fewest kills is the WINNAAARGH!!!

Wanted Yahtzee to win.
I knew Jim was going to win as soon as I read they were going head-to-head on a FPS.

This episode vindicated the rest. BTW, you didn't specify, is it prepared mustard a la Gulden's or Grey Poupon or mustard powder from the spice rack? My ghost is telling me the latter might possibly be toxic, really.

Also, Jim, since you seem to be here on a more regular basis, is Movie Defense Force ever going to go weekly? I mean on a regular basis. Just curious.

I wanted Yahtzee to win, but on the other hand, I wanted Yahtzee to do the poetry since he's better at it. Also, I'm willing to bet Yahtzee's reaction to a spoonful of mustard will be far more entertaining, what with his virgin mouth. Jim's mouth has likely seen far worse... :p

LenticularHomicide:

archiebawled:

Aristatide:
I never realized you guys had such a fear of mustard. Or is it mustard and poetry combined specifically?

I'd wager they're talking about English mustard, which is rather strong compared to other types.

True that. Even wasabi's got nothing on English mustard. Wasabi will flay your tastebuds; English mustard'll eat your face.

This would explain it! So it's more in the range of my father's homemade horseradish, which we used for curing sinus infections. Guys, you have to tell us these things; vast swaths of the world are looking in confusion from our French's bottle to the screen and back again and impugning your masculinity. And we can't have that!

JET1971:
I wouldn't mind seeing HL2 Episode 2. The final battle against the striders, most striders killed in 10 minutes wins. If not that then hard mode "Where Cubbage Fears to Tread". First to take out the airship wins or match restarts if someone dies and 3 out of 5 deaths is the loser.

Ooh, I actually like this plan. IDK why I didn't think of the Half-Life games sooner, there's some definite amazing potential for screwing around there.

Also, I just want to say, I notice Xbox has rereleased San Andreas with some updates. (And framerate issues but I still bought it for the third time just because of the achievements and have embraced my new personal pathetic.) So you know, that beating people to death with flowers thing I've been suggesting. Might be timely.

An homage to "Quake Done Quick" in my Uncivil War?

Oh yes, quake for a final is absolutely awesome. Solid run for the end, though.

Doesn't Quake have insanely buggy movement controls? I was surprised that I didn't see any attempts at rocket-strafing or dinglehopping or whatever other exploits Quakers use to go faster.

Auron225:
You know, I have been rooting for Yahtzee since the beginning, but a mustard-infused poem by Yahtzee sounds fantastic - I'm ok with this :D

I agree... I mean, if poetry's something the loser has to do, then I'm glad Yahtzee's the loser... Plus, mustard's just the icing of the cake at this point...

OT: Well, time to wait for the Season 1 DVD and Blu-Ray to come out with director and/or producer commentaries and even some behind-the-scenes look at the preparation for each of the matches...

Everything to be said has been said, it seems. Well . . . yes, it is sad to see Yahtzee lose, after the whole underdog thing, but his poetry will certainly have a wonderful sting to it that should go nicely with the mustard. And then, naturally, I wonder if https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7lF7ir6qxQA has been suggested for the pair to compete in yet. Might be worthwhile, no? Hell, spice it up by giving both Jim and Yahtzee two beasts each to play as, with the condition that the back-up beast may not be intentionally struck until after the first beast is out of a match.

Error: Double-post.

Is the next video late or am I early?

I hope Yahtzee didn't choke on the mustard. This is a bit worrying... =(

I saw on Jim's channel on YouTube that Jimquisition is breaking off from Escapist. I wonder if that has anything to do with Friday's episode of this going MIA.

Yeah, I'm wondering where the poem video is myself. And if there's going to be a badge for watching every episode of the Jimquisition!

Is uncivil war still going? or is Jim's transcendence stopped uncivil war? I know that if they are still going on then they ain't going up on the escapist.

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