TF2 Update: The Engineer With the Golden Wrench

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TF2 Update: The Engineer With the Golden Wrench

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At long last, the Team Fortress 2 Engineer is getting some love from Valve, including an epic, generation-spanning comic and the debut of the fabled Golden Wrench.

The Engineer is a humble man, eschewing flash and glory for effectiveness and results. His quiet reliability leaves him often overlooked amidst the chaos and carnage of the TF2 battlefield, yet without the rock-solid foundation provided by his various creations, many a team would collapse in disarray. It's nice to see, then, that the hard-hatted hero is finally starting to get the respect he deserves.

Expanding yet further upon the Team Fortress 2 lore is Loose Cannon, a lengthy comic telling the tale of not just the current Engineer but also his forebears, going all the way back to 1890 - which is apparently when the long-running conflict between the Red and the Blue first began. The game's deep connection with the mysterious land of Australia, a nation of "lager-pickled idiots" that just happens to be set atop the world's only "transformative" element, is also explored to hilarious effect.

From a more practical perspective, the Golden Wrench, which was discovered in the game's files following the July 1 update, has also apparently gone live. The Golden Wrench appears to be identical to its standard drop-forged steel counterpart, except that enemies killed with it turn into golden statues. Only five wrenches were supposed to drop but a bug in the drop system resulted in more being set loose, according to the Team Fortress Wiki; specific requirements to earn the Golden Wrench aren't currently known but the TF2 Backpack Examiner says only 16 players currently possess it.

The odds are good that there's more to come for gaming's foremost practical problem solver, so keep an eye on the Team Fortress blog for updates!

Thanks to Sir Kemper for the tip.

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*Squee*

Nice to see them putting in some back story for this one.

Those 16 people must be hassled about where they got the wrenches all the time...

Nice to see they are still updating what is a rather old game now... and without subscription fees...

I had my funtimes with TF2, I don't think I'll be attempting to get back into it though.

Man I want to play TF2 badly now. God damn my brothers for blowing up my computer.

*Squoo*

I wonder what new shit there will be.

I'm loading up a game as I type!

Banana Phone Man:
Man I want to play TF2 badly now. God damn my brothers for blowing up the computer.

You're directly related to homeland terrorists?

This update is looking pretty splendiferous. Cann'ae wait.
Speculation as to what it will be at this point seems useless, but I really would like mobile buildings.

Am I wrong for immediatly thinking "The man with the Golden Wrench..."

(Please tell me someone gets the reference!)

The golden wrench is stupid IMO. It doesn't follow the valve formula of, its a new weapon, with a new ability or something, but it has a downside (Cant do this, or less dmg/ total health). And chances are, if your an engineer, you have probably got a dispenser in arms reach, you don't need the extra metal. If you don't know what I'm talking about, read the wiki article.

EDIT: They removed it from the article.

Basically, when you kill someone with the wrench, you "Collected" the person you turned to gold, and turned them into metal for building engineer stuff.

Remember when this game was just about red and blue people shooting at eachother? It's so fucking complex these days I can't see how a new player would be able to figure it all out...

Pielikey:
Remember when this game was just about red and blue people shooting at eachother? It's so fucking complex these days I can't see how a new player would be able to figure it all out...

Err...it still is basically the same. Have gun. Shoot. That's it really.

So the pyro is really Lincoln.

It all makes sense now.

...

I LIKE THIS COUGAR'S PEPPER SAUCE!

Jaredin:
Am I wrong for immediatly thinking "The man with the Golden Wrench..."

(Please tell me someone gets the reference!)

The man with the Golden Gun?

This is kinda weird for a TF2 weapon. It seems so... normal. Rather tame, really. I wonder if any other class is going to get a golden trophy like this?

Speaking of TF2, I'm getting desperate. I'm trying to run it on Steam for Mac, but the servers are always too busy to handle my request. I've tried everything suggested on the FAQ, so if anyone has something to clear up the servers or my Mac, I'd appreciate it immensely.

They sure do know how to hype shit up.

I CAN HAZ WRENCH?!
I've been waiting for an engineer update, but I guess this works for the time being. But what is the point of turning people in to golden statues?

Might be nitpicking here (in fact, I know I am), but the name of the comic is "loose Canon", not "Loose cannon"
IT'S THAT DEM THERE WORDPLAY!
Also, it starts in 1850, not 1890.
Yeah, feel bad about your inaccuracies and having a life!

Jaredin:
Am I wrong for immediatly thinking "The man with the Golden Wrench..."

(Please tell me someone gets the reference!)

Are you referencing the movie or the Alice Cooper song?

Because I haven't yet seen the movie.

Valve just had to do this while I'm on vacation without any acess to TF2 whatsoever... bastards.

Pielikey:
Remember when this game was just about red and blue people shooting at eachother? It's so fucking complex these days I can't see how a new player would be able to figure it all out...

It...still is. Sure you get new items, every now and then but that's hardly massively complex, and the comics are easy to follow alongside the fact that you dont need to understand them to play the game.

Well there goes my staining the swing and organizing the garage today... -.-

Irridium:

I LIKE THIS COUGAR'S PEPPER SAUCE!

This is why the comics are so great.

So people can get the wrench, but no one knows how too...hmmm... Come on gang, to the Mystery Machine!

Now just watch as every TF2 server in existence gets flooded with engineers.

I think I'll go spy for a while...

Jaredin:
Am I wrong for immediatly thinking "The man with the Golden Wrench..."

(Please tell me someone gets the reference!)

I get it. Any Bond fan should get this reference.

Golden Wrench 21 just dropped, there was a gamewide announcement as it did.

Wrenches are all well and good but I wants my shiny new shotgun.

Only 16? Why even put it in the game if your only going to be releasing it to that many people.

Echo136:
Only 16? Why even put it in the game if your only going to be releasing it to that many people.

You act like reskinning a wrench is a complex and secret process known only to the Techpriests on Mars or something. It really isn't. And only 16 people so far have it. Maybe more will get it, maybe they won't.

Lincoln's the F*cking pyro... oh god how I love valve! I kinda wanna know how they determined which 16 people would get the wrenches... I sense a storm a'brewin :P

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Kajt:
Valve just had to do this while I'm on vacation without any acess to TF2 whatsoever... bastards.

the update isn't out yet. They just started the teasing campaign

Only five were supposed to drop? Does this sound like a Willy Wonka/Golden Ticket sort of thing to anyone?

EDIT: Maybe the 5 people who got it would get all the engineer unlocks for free, or a trip to Valve offices, or something.

which mercenary is the engineer? I think it's the mailman, but there's no real indication of that other than process of elimination. Was that grandfather conagher's son, since he is never mentioned? Or is he just a dumb deadbeat father who wasn't worth mentioning in the comic?

sooperman:
This is kinda weird for a TF2 weapon. It seems so... normal. Rather tame, really. I wonder if any other class is going to get a golden trophy like this?

Speaking of TF2, I'm getting desperate. I'm trying to run it on Steam for Mac, but the servers are always too busy to handle my request. I've tried everything suggested on the FAQ, so if anyone has something to clear up the servers or my Mac, I'd appreciate it immensely.

i found just wait, after a while, it works, and it seems to get faster every time for me.

Irridium:
So the pyro is really Lincoln.

It all makes sense now.

I personally like to think the pyro is a victim of the holocaust: He was put in the crematoriums, but didn't die.

With his horrible disfigured and burned skin, he wore a flame proof suit to protect from his horrible past, while using fire as an ironic weapon to put other through the pain he suffered.

Then again I think everyone should be able to imagine who the pyro really is

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