Lego Universe Has Immense Levels of Phallus Protection

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Lego Universe Has Immense Levels of Phallus Protection

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Try as you might, it's going to be extremely tough to show children a Lego phallus in Lego Universe.

Lego Universe is an MMO where players collect various types of bricks as they complete quests and defeat enemies. Those bricks can then be used to create anything the player wants, just as they would with Lego pieces in the real world. Let's think about this: a kid-friendly MMO, and players able to create anything they want and show it to other players. See the problem?

It'd only be a matter of time before NetDevil were attacked by parents whose children had been shown Lego genitalia if proper protections weren't put in place. Luckily, NetDevil wasn't born yesterday and knows the ways of online players and their phallic obsession.

MTV Multiplayer has the details on how NetDevil has implemented some seriously deep levels of protection to avoid trouble of this sort. First of all, every created object (and player name) has to be approved before it's displayed to other players. Until NetDevil takes a look, these things remain hidden.

Friends can see other friends' creations, but becoming friends isn't as easy as it is in other MMOs. People constantly complain about Wii friend codes and how uncharacteristically unfriendly they are, and NetDevil's "friending" system works in a similar way to keep kids safe. Players must share their "Lego IDs" outside of the game's world and invite each other to become friends. There is no in-game notification at all.

Parents can even totally block this system and freeze Lego Universe into only showing their kids pre-approved objects. Not that it'll matter in the long run, because if someone on the internet wants to show someone else something terrible, it's going to happen no matter what. Players will probably just assemble pre-approved objects into the shape of a phallus instead. However, kudos should go to NetDevil for making a Herculean effort here, and I hope it's successful.

Edit: Lego Universe is under development by NetDevil, not Funcom as previously reported.

Source: MTV Multiplayer

Permalink

They will fail.

If MMO players(or people on the internet in general) want to make penises, they will make penises. No way around it.

My brother is/was in the beta for that MMO - I'll have to ask him if he ever tried assembling a Lego wang at any point. The game itself looked pretty fun from what I saw of him playing it, very whimsical.

Is there anything inherently wrong with showing parts of the body? This seems to be America's UBER-FEAR of the moment. Not something as simple as Terrorist nukes, but Katy Perry jiggling with Elmo and now "A KID MIGHT SEE A LEGO PENIS!"

Won't the modders just create a vagina or anus instead?

It's kind of sad that precautions like this need to be taken, but props to Funcom for the dedication.

This looks like a challenge for a 4chan.

...im making a prediction, yes.

I thought that game looked actually pretty fun.
Mabey not so much now.

Irridium:
They will fail.

If MMO players(or people on the internet in general) want to make penises, they will make penises. No way around it.

But how much will they want to make penises? If the systems in place make it extremely difficult to get around I doubt people will invest much time and effort just so they can show innocent 3 year old joey they're magnificend sharp edged writhing purple pyphon.

The_root_of_all_evil:
Is there anything inherently wrong with showing parts of the body? This seems to be America's UBER-FEAR of the moment. Not something as simple as Terrorist nukes, but Katy Perry jiggling with Elmo and now "A KID MIGHT SEE A LEGO PENIS!"

Won't the modders just create a vagina or anus instead?

To be fair, Elmo deserves better than that.

hansari:
This looks like a challenge for a 4chan.

...im making a prediction, yes.

Ooh fun! Well, not for the people who have to go through the submitted things, but the thought of a room full of people going through the submissions constantly denying thousands of penises all day while not being able to get to any of the legit submissions before clocking out for the day made the evil bastard in me chuckle.

The_root_of_all_evil:
Is there anything inherently wrong with showing parts of the body? This seems to be America's UBER-FEAR of the moment. Not something as simple as Terrorist nukes, but Katy Perry jiggling with Elmo and now "A KID MIGHT SEE A LEGO PENIS!"

Won't the modders just create a vagina or anus instead?

I'm so tempted to make a Goatse on Minecraft right now...

mjc0961:
To be fair, Elmo deserves better than that.

I dunno, Elmo is only a step up from Barney in my book. Although he still has more talent than Ms Brand.

SomeBritishDude:

Irridium:
They will fail.

If MMO players(or people on the internet in general) want to make penises, they will make penises. No way around it.

But how much will they want to make penises? If the systems in place make it extremely difficult to get around I doubt people will invest much time and effort just so they can show innocent 3 year old joey they're magnificend sharp edged writhing purple pyphon.

Simple, they will want to very badly now.

Funcom basically just challenged them with this. It may not be worded as one, but the internet at large will see it as one, and try harder to best it.

Kind of like how everyone tried their hardest to crack Spore's DRM and pirate it to hell and back, because EA said they couldn't.

imnotparanoid:
I thought that game looked actually pretty fun.
Mabey not so much now.

by your statement i can gather the game only looked fun when you thought you could make lego penises. So a games fun is only mesured by how many penises you can show to young children... interesting reveal about yourself there.

The question is if a moderator can't recognize it as a phallus, how can a kid?

Urrm, I was interested in this until I heard about the friend code thing.

Now I'm not sure I'll even bother with a trial.

That must be a fun job... being the guys who have to approve every created object. I can only imagine what comes on their monitors daily. And how do you explain that to people at a dinner party or something?

"So John, what do you do for work?"
"Currently I make sure that no penises or vaginas get online in the Lego Universe."

psrdirector:

imnotparanoid:
I thought that game looked actually pretty fun.
Mabey not so much now.

by your statement i can gather the game only looked fun when you thought you could make lego penises. So a games fun is only mesured by how many penises you can show to young children... interesting reveal about yourself there.

No I just dont like the whole freind , waiting to get stuff shown thing, when I was like 8 I was on the lego website and to get a message show on the forum it took about two weeks.

What the fuck is the modern worlds problem with fucking nudity. Dicks, about half of us have got one. Why does everyone have to be so fucking closed up about it. It's a 100% natural fucking thing.

Stupid twats.

Irridium:
They will fail.

If MMO players(or people on the internet in general) want to make penises, they will make penises. No way around it.

Agreed - They have done it with Halo Reach, they will do it with Lego.

No two ways about it

It's good to see they're taking precautions... but fucking sad that it's necessary in the first place.

So i could make a Scarab?...Or an AT-AT...

Or a Warthog? hell, even a giant Pikachu?

Me thinks i will check this out =D

I'm still trying to scrub the concept of a lego-lob-on from my mind. My immediate reaction to hearing of the concept was to think: "Christ that'd make your eyes water!"

If anyone spots my mind floating down the gutter, please let me know!

Wardy

I would like to say congratulations to these people, they've done something which actually makes a great deal of sense - they've stopped the parents before they can complain and they've come close to stopping something which is prevalent in traditional MMOs.

Whether you think the human body should be desexualised is another matter, but for now - great job, Net Devil.

God forbid your kid will giggle at some other kid's Penis machine. God forbid.

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I believe this is very appropriate.

imnotparanoid:

psrdirector:

imnotparanoid:
I thought that game looked actually pretty fun.
Mabey not so much now.

by your statement i can gather the game only looked fun when you thought you could make lego penises. So a games fun is only mesured by how many penises you can show to young children... interesting reveal about yourself there.

No I just dont like the whole freind , waiting to get stuff shown thing, when I was like 8 I was on the lego website and to get a message show on the forum it took about two weeks.

sure thats the reason....

but im sure the wait time wont be very long, i would wait till we get some people actually comenting on it.

so.. it could have been awesome... but it isn't...

I'll just buy minecraft and Gerry's mod and move on. At least I can make Dick Valley.

Nice try but we all know that some people really have nothing better to do with there time then try to break system in order to create penises. Makes me wonder about there mental state when they are that obsessed with penises that they have to have them in everything though.
Also,
image

Twilight_guy:
Nice try but we all know that some people really have nothing better to do with there time then try to break system in order to create penises.

Nothing better to do? Pah! It's the people who play MMO's who have nothing better to do, the
genitalia griefers are at least providing a valuable service to the community -- teaching us all the lesson that if something can theoretically be corrupted, you can bet that the goons and channers are already on it.

Twilight_guy:

Makes me wonder about there mental state when they are that obsessed with penises that they have to have them in everything though.

I see you have never heard of the honourable Sigmund Freud? If the question stated above truly bothers you, Freud's works will be most enlightening.

Well thats the one reason to buy this gone.

a challenge you say?

also, how do you play an MMO without other people?
if i wanted to play alone with bricks, i'd just make a school project for my 3D class (if i feel like working), or just take out my old box of lego's

Well....glad I'm not getting it, the game will probably traumatize kids for years. And this post reminds me of a certain Superbad scene....you know the one.

Irridium:
They will fail.

If MMO players(or people on the internet in general) want to make penises, they will make penises. No way around it.

PENIS-COPTER!
The picture for this article was slightly disappointing I was expecting to see a lego dick. Anyway now I have a massive urge to play with lego.... shit and I have hmwk to do too.

Tom Goldman:
However, kudos should go to NetDevil for making a herculean effort here, and I hope they're successful.

I think the Greek character you're looking for is Sisyphus, not Hercules. Sisyphus is the guy whose hell was having to roll a boulder up a hill only for it to roll back down, for eternity, making him pretty much the patron saint of futile gestures on doomed projects.

I think it's a matter of time before someone works out how to make penises, and now that the penis-making community has been challenged, I suspect it'll happen swiftly.

so, the challenge has been issued

Allan Foe:

Twilight_guy:
Nice try but we all know that some people really have nothing better to do with there time then try to break system in order to create penises.

Nothing better to do? Pah! It's the people who play MMO's who have nothing better to do, the
genitalia griefers are at least providing a valuable service to the community -- teaching us all the lesson that if something can theoretically be corrupted, you can bet that the goons and channers are already on it.

Twilight_guy:

Makes me wonder about there mental state when they are that obsessed with penises that they have to have them in everything though.

I see you have never heard of the honourable Sigmund Freud? If the question stated above truly bothers you, Freud's works will be most enlightening.

Don't be a troll. It saddens me that somebody really gets a kick out of the childish act of trying to put penises in a kid's game. It's like a 5 year old laughing over the word 'ass' because its taboo. The constant necessity to break rules and be the deviant seems is always associated with negative metal states and I wish games weren't a magnet for people like that. Oh and with Freud always struck me as being far to concerned with sex on the whole anyways. GO Lego game designer dudes! I believe in you and your inevitably leaky but still worthwhile system!

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