Australian News Site Makes Hilarious Star Trek Apology

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Australian News Site Makes Hilarious Star Trek Apology

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The Australian site News.com.au has issued a five-alarm apology to Star Trek fans incensed over a "poorly-researched" article, acknowledging that there were many Enterprises, Captain Kirk didn't command them all and that Patrick Stewart is indeed a handsome man.

On November 2, News.com.au published a story about the Haynes Workshop Manual for the U.S.S. Enterprise, covering models from 2151 onwards. The Haynes name will likely be familiar to those of you with an automotive bent; Haynes Manuals have been helping do-it-yourself types keep their cars in good running order since the 60s. The Enterprise guide is a legit Haynes product, supervised by none other than Star Trek Technical Manual co-writer Michael Okuda as a cool holiday gift for the hardcore Star Trek nerds we all know and love.

Unfortunately for the author of the article, those same Star Trek nerds got pretty riled up over what they perceived as inexcusable inaccuracies in the short, amusing blurb about the novelty gift. "Could this article be any more wrong. The Enterprise-E did not replace Kirks enterprise," the very first commenter, calling himself "Your Mum's Lunch," wrote in a [sic]-filled rant. "The Excelsior class Enterprise-B replaced kirks ship after Kirks ship was lost at the Genesis plant at the hands of the klingons. Upon their return to McKinley station after travelling back in time to get some whales, Kirk and crew were handed command of the enterprise-A, a constitution refit. After which, we saw the enterprise-B come on the scene."

It goes on like that for awhile.

Faced with such rage, News.com.au did the only thing it could: It issued a respectful, heartfelt and extremely thorough apology.

"News.com.au apologizes unreservedly for the error," the paper wrote after briefly explaining the history of the various Enterprise models. "There was no intention whatsoever to suggest Captain Kirk may have commanded the Galaxy Class Starships Enterprise-D and Enterprise-E."

"Any damage to the Star Trek brand incurred by the use of the term 'hyperspace' is regretful. No malice was intended and a correction to the original article will be made," it continued. "We also agree that Patrick Stewart is a handsome man, a sentiment expressed by several readers."

Hysterically, the apology column actually repeated one glaring error in the original article, referring to the Enterprise as "NNC-1701" rather than the proper "NCC-1701," an oversight that seemed to drive some Trekkies to even greater heights of frothing nerd apoplexy. Unless, of course, it was intentional - but surely a respected online news site wouldn't do something as gauche as trolling its readers, would it?

Regardless, News.com.au covered that base as well in an addendum: "We're also sorry for any errors in this apology."

via: Twitter

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oh boy that is genious, I wish my local news sites were that awesome

That's hilarious. Blatently obvious that their stance is "If you suffer from nerdrage over this, you deserve to be trolled. Rly."

wait... they implied that Sir Patrick Stewart WASNT handsome?! How dare they!

Funny article.

It kinda brightened my day a bit!

Nice to see 'the news' correcting itself when wrong.

I am impressed by the obvious humility and goodwill presented by news.com.au

Bravo good sirs. Bravo.

And Patrick Stewart is a very handsome man.

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A handsome man.

-----------------

OT: Everybody knows that the Enterprise-E was the most badass of them all, anyway. It was an actual warship!

Professional Trolling; One of the few jobs that we all secretly want but will never achieve unless through miraculous luck.

Oh, and win for Australian news outlets.

Andy Chalk:
Galaxy Class Starships Enterprise-D and Enterprise-E."

THE ENTREPRISE E WAS SOVEREIGN CLASS~!

FFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUU-

-m

God I love this country.

OT: Hilarious thread was uplifting. Cheers, Escapist :D

Matt_LRR:

Andy Chalk:
Galaxy Class Starships Enterprise-D and Enterprise-E."

THE ENTREPRISE E WAS SOVEREIGN CLASS~!

FFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUU-

-m

You too, sir. Thank you for the laugh! I needed it.

Australians are hereby epic trolls.

Gold, gold I say!
I love this country and all the trolling that we can do.

Actually they forgot to give any acknowlegement to Christopher Pike in the history, he was the captain before Kirk and in the pilot! This is just not right, if they are going to do a manual on The Enterprise at least give it's full, accurate history! ... oh my, my rage is overpowering... arghhh! ARGHHH!!!! <turns green and muscle bound and leaps out the window>

The article is boring, but oh boy, just scroll down to the comments.

Matt_LRR:

Andy Chalk:
Galaxy Class Starships Enterprise-D and Enterprise-E."

THE ENTREPRISE E WAS SOVEREIGN CLASS~!

FFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUU-

-m

Beat me to it. I was just going to say.

Not that I'm a huge Star Trek nerd or anything, mind. I certainly don't have models of both Enterprises D and E which I can compare at my leisure. Oh heavens no.

And they got all the model codes wrong too, EVEN IN THE APOLOGY.

ITS NCC* NOT NNC*

Matt_LRR:
FFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUU-

It's people like this that make me ashamed to be a life long Star Trek Fan....

Sheer awesomeness....I have an overwhelming urge to start quoting Shakespeare in the Original Klingon all of a sudden.

minimacker:
Australians are hereby epic trolls.

No we are not, also have you heard about drop bears.

This is why I will miss print media.

They print an apology, but in secret they laugh at us.

Well, you don't fuck with Trekkies.....they're terrifying in groups......

Oh my. I never understood the whole "Nerd Rage" thing. I am a nerd and proud of the fact, but I never got upset when popular culture got things wrong about vidja games or anime back when they weren't main stream.

Matt_LRR:

Andy Chalk:
Galaxy Class Starships Enterprise-D and Enterprise-E."

THE ENTREPRISE E WAS SOVEREIGN CLASS~!

FFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUU-

-m

IT'S SPELLED ENTERPRISE, NOT ENTREPRISE!

FFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUU-

OT: Sadly as it is, I likely would have pointed out all of those things as well. Learn your Star Trek if you are going to sell a product based on it, people! *Shakes fist menacingly*

Goldeneye1989:

minimacker:
Australians are hereby epic trolls.

No we are not, also have you heard about drop bears.

Bloody Rupert Murdoch and his lack of Star Trek knowledge, also I can't afford to ride a kangaroo to work so I use a wombat instead.

Okay, first: *buys manual*.

Second: Hee hee hee... both original article and apology have given me much to giggle over.

I wouldn't be so generous to news.com.au for their apology.

They're just another cog in Murdoch's media machine.
News.com.au is pure evil.

The Shade:
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A handsome man.

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OT: Everybody knows that the Enterprise-E was the most badass of them all, anyway. It was an actual warship!

While the E was badass, I'm more partial to the Enterprise-D. There is just something to be said for a starship that is like a luxury liner with massive amounts of fire power.

Yes in war time I would most likely go with the E, but in peace time I would cruise around in the D.

Skeneo:

Goldeneye1989:

minimacker:
Australians are hereby epic trolls.

No we are not, also have you heard about drop bears.

Bloody Rupert Murdoch and his lack of Star Trek knowledge, also I can't afford to ride a kangaroo to work so I use a wombat instead.

Everyone knows the rich people ride emus
My country is best at trolling

cocoro67:

Skeneo:

Goldeneye1989:

No we are not, also have you heard about drop bears.

Bloody Rupert Murdoch and his lack of Star Trek knowledge, also I can't afford to ride a kangaroo to work so I use a wombat instead.

Everyone knows the rich people ride emus

Oh pah, that's not true at all. They ride poor people like in every other country.

Amusingly enough, the poll on that page asks "Which class starship is the best?" The final option is "Those NNC ones". Can you guess which has the most votes?

While part of me is vibrating with rage at them posting a Trek article without even the most basic research - Another is loving their sense of humour about the whole thing

Matt_LRR:

Andy Chalk:
Galaxy Class Starships Enterprise-D and Enterprise-E."

THE ENTREPRISE E WAS SOVEREIGN CLASS~!

FFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUU-

-m

i'm glad i wasn't the only one who noticed this...

lol trolling their readers. Not as good as Scalia Trolling California but still funny nonetheless XD

Well i just found my dad a christmas present.

Fear us, for we are Trekkies. We are many.

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