Stay Abreast of This Titillating Indie Fighting Game

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Stay Abreast of This Titillating Indie Fighting Game

Warriors of Elysia, the sequel to 2002's Bikini Karate Babes, is probably the most gratuitous fighting game you will see in 2010.

In 2002, Creative Edge Studios made Bikini Karate Babes, a tongue-in-cheek fighter that poked fun at modern fighting game conventions seen in games like Soul Calibur and Dead or Alive: Fully clothed guys and girls fighting in lingerie.

Now here we have the trailer for Warriors of Elysia, and it's ... I'm sorry, I don't even know. I have no idea how to describe this game. It's digitized sprites a la early Mortal Kombat or Street Fighter: The Movie: The Game, and everything about it is ridiculous.

Though it says something about me that the thing I find most objectionable about this is that there is a character named Venus and one named Aphrodite. Clearly, Creative Edge doesn't know its Greco-Roman mythology.

You can preorder Warriors of Elysia for £14.95 on Direct2Drive), but why would you want to? You'd be online by definition, and it's not like you can't find boobs elsewhere online.

(Via RPS)

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That's so terribly unsexy that I couldn't even bring myself to finish watching the trailer.

Why must developers keep making games like this?!

What is this? I don't even...

to think someone put time into this makes me weep. Not for them... but for what little respect they have for time itself.

I guess it'll sell well-enough.

As for me, it certainly isn't 'MOAR' but...wouldn't go "DO NOT WANT" for it either. So it's awwwwwwwright!

I'm gonna buy this. Not for the game, not for the boobs, but for the sheer fact that this might have been the most awful thing made, ever.

Mister Funk, I hereby sentence you to twelve months writing about developments in the Bratz toyline for the awful, awful puns you made in this title.

This game looks terrible. And not just in that 'really bad' way, but in that 'this thing surpasses parody and comes all the way around to bad again' way.

It's like Meet the Spartans or Epic Movie, something so truly hideous that's it's not even retro funny. Still, I suppose congrtulations must go to the team for putting any effort into this, and it still looks funny, which is something I guess.

This game looks like something from 1998. Seriously the live-action women who awkwardly kick and punch :P.

I didn't know Glen Quagmire was a real person and made videogames....

He looks so cartoony in family guy...

It's a game based entirely around sex appeal, but it doesn't have any. Truly awful.

It's like Dead or Alive, but without any male characters!

And likely lacking any solid fighting mechanics!

The live-action footage was slightly hot, but this doesn't do anything for me.

Citrus Insanity:
It's a game based entirely around sex appeal, but it doesn't have any. Truly awful.

:DDD
Exactly what I was gonna say!

Screw it, I couldn't bring myself to watch the entire trailer, it was that awful of a game.

Where did they find women to do something that stupid?

My GOTY for sure.

We need to break into whatever basement that this was made in and destroy it.

Not intentionally, of course. We would never intentionally kill the *ahem* "creativity" of someone. Data simply tends to get mixed up when you put the entire hard drive through cleansing flames.

Ugh, those puns. Funk, you boob. trollface.jpg

I will have to play this at some point, just to see if it's as shit as the trailer suggests.

ryai458:
Where did they find women to do something that stupid?

Yeah, I know. About 3/4 into the trailer, I was wondering, what do these women's PARENTS think about this!?

haha, I actually liked the John's puns more than the game. As a matter of fact, here is mine:

Float like a mammary, sting like a mammary's milk in the eye in this boobiful fighting game.

Firetaffer:
This game looks like something from 1998. Seriously the live-action women who awkwardly kick and punch :P.

CD-i Lives!

Looks pretty broken as a fighting game, even from just the few seconds of attacks. Moreover sex appeal was obviously what they were pinning their hopes on here, they really should've tried a bit harder to find more attractive models. Wouldn't download this if it was free, couldn't even be bothered to finish the trailer.

Putting away that the nature of this game puts back gaming by about 30 years, I can't believe there's games looking this bad still being made and getting green lit to a release.

This reminds me of the flurry of godawful MK clones that appeared around the release of the original Mortal Kombat, just seeing the jump animation or the 'got kicked over' animation makes me cringe. The idea that a really bad picture of a woman in a bikini would be enough to make up for everything else, (and remember, this is a world with the internet, where you actively have to try to avoid seeing porn), just depresses me.

To think we once thought Tomb Raider reflected badly on male gamers.

MelasZepheos:
Mister Funk, I hereby sentence you to twelve months writing about developments in the Bratz toyline for the awful, awful puns you made in this title.

This game looks terrible. And not just in that 'really bad' way, but in that 'this thing surpasses parody and comes all the way around to bad again' way.

Harsh sentence dude but yeah, this is just so bad it's not even funny bad. I think I lost a few IQ points just by watching the whole trailer. D:

This looks like a frakking CD-i game and my main question is where did they find that many women who were dumb enough to agree to this?

You can preorder Warriors of Elysia for £14.95 on Direct2Drive), but why would you want to? You'd be online by definition, and it's not like you can't find boobs elsewhere online.

Maybe it has a really deep fighting mechanic?.

Nah only kidding, this looks like "Street Fighter The Movie: The Game", only with less Jean Claude and more boobs.

Though it says something about me that the thing I find most objectionable about this is that there is a character named Venus and one named Aphrodite. Clearly, Creative Edge doesn't know its Greco-Roman mythology.

Speaking of which!, who played God of War 3?, in this Greek Myth tour de force you fight Hercules, the Roman God of Courage!
image

He's called Heracles in Greek myths you dingbats!.

Those are some seriously over elaborate take downs.

It doesn't seem to be any worse than Dead of Alive to me.
Well I mean it's worse in that it's of a lower quality.

This is the greatest thing ever. This goes beyond offensive or awful. This is like someone filmed the SyFi channel and made a game.

Day 1 purchase right here

(IRONY IRONY IRONY)

That's what I call jiggle physics!!!!

Actually it's pretty cool that they put the real girls in the game. I don't know if I've seen that before...

ryai458:
Where did they find women to do something that stupid?

Can usually find them hanging around street corners and parks late at night...

This game looks...erm.....yeah, I got nothin'

Sorry John, were you saying something? I was being distracted...

Am I the only person here who would seriously play the game and enjoy it? Then again I have Rumble Roses XX for the xbox 360. Just wish they would make this Warriors of Elysia game a tad more brutal, more violent take downs, more special effects.
Also I have the Bikini Karate Babes demo on my computer. It's not the best fighting game in the world but the sex appeal does make it playable.

I vaguely recall seeing a trailer for this game years ago. Maybe 5 or more. I assumed it was canceled.

Sadly, I was wrong.

Am I going to be the first one to say it? Well, I'm aroused.

Also, I'm glad I'm not the only one who immediately thought of games like Mad Dog McCree and other laserdisc and CD-i games. I would think with modern day CGI you could put real people into an animated world and not have it look like it did 20 years ago(Mad Dog McCree came out in 1990?! Bah, I'm old).

Between this type of visual presentation and the kinect sex game they put up yesterday I have this bad feeling that this is all going to mix with todays fads to make games with live-action erotic quick time events. "I call this move 'climbing the colossus!'"

Edit: Someone above mentioned how they should make this game more violent and I somehow combined it with Mortal Kombat. 'Finish her! Nudity, Venus wins!'

The fact that they got this many girls with so little self-respect makes me weep for the entire female gender.
Actually, I'll give those women the benefit of the doubt and assume the developers were holding their families hostage.

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