This Is Diablo, As Told in a Minute

This Is Diablo, As Told in a Minute

Prime Evils and fat stupid kings, oh my!

Before there was the superb-looking Diablo III, there was the classic Diablo II. Before Diablo II, there was Diablo, the game that started it all. And before Diablo, a bunch of humans in the land of Sanctuary made some very questionable decisions.

This YouTube video chronicles the lore and backstory of Diablo in just about one minute. It's cute, funny, and also rather true - really, those Soul Stones just turned out to be a real pain in the neck, didn't they? Tyrael, your team done goofed, and done goofed hard.

The only thing this video is missing is Deckard Cain, as voiced by Sean Connery. And the only thing that we're missing is Diablo III, which needs to come out ASAP.

Well, maybe it could wait a bit. I'm still playing Portal 2.

Permalink

Very good indeed! This'll get me ready for Diablo 3 just fine because I just couldn't wrestle through Diablo 1. While I can see the great concept behind it it just felt too...archaic, and had little redeeming value otherwise (since I'm not much of a lootwhore). It could've been one of my favourite games if only I played it years ago. Modern technology has spoiled me.

Edit
Well, that story doesn't sound too shabby at all. The video's hilarious to boot. Plus that girl is extremely cute. Sorry...

Yo escapist get rid of the new guy and give her his job.

I enjoyed that, so I followed the link to her channel, where my ears were raped by nyan cat.

Gxas is not pleased.

Well they weren't monks there were Horadric mages

outer then that it was right
and dam funny too

I remember when these guys did Cthulu in a minute.

Shit was good.

I finally understand this game! Thanks

-M

Gxas:
I enjoyed that, so I followed the link to her channel, where my ears were raped by nyan cat.

Gxas is not pleased.

That is a perfectly accurate depiction of my response to this video as well.

dmase:
Yo escapist get rid of the new guy and give her his job.

This, anything to rid the Escapist of Jim.

GIVE. HER. SHOW. Please :)

Dodger is a delightful ball of humor and cuteness. I don't know if she deserves her own show, but her gaming news show is really entertaining to watch.

Iklwa:
GIVE. HER. SHOW. Please :)

"Because. Why not"

This had nothing to do with Diablo. It didn't mention clicking, health & mana meters, skill trees, loot or palette swaps.

Oh, you mean there was a story to all that?

Reminds me of that Tankspot-girl.

Fucked up dummies fucked you up. The End :P

Funny stuff.

i agree with others about giving her Jims spot.

Cowabungaa:
Very good indeed! This'll get me ready for Diablo 3 just fine because I just couldn't wrestle through Diablo 1. While I can see the great concept behind it it just felt too...archaic, and had little redeeming value otherwise (since I'm not much of a lootwhore). It could've been one of my favourite games if only I played it years ago. Modern technology has spoiled me.

Edit
Well, that story doesn't sound too shabby at all. The video's hilarious to boot. Plus that girl is extremely cute. Sorry...

Some things were wrong, "a lot of other stuff" left out well, a lot of other stuff, and I have no idea where she got the notion the king was fat. Deckard says he was a "Mighty warrior". That doesn't sound like "Fat fluffly pillow man" to me. A similar synopsis of the civil war would go:

"A long time ago there were some guys with slaves. Then there was this fat guy with a biiiig hat. A lot of other stuff happened... John Wilks Booth!"

Just saying, you're missing a lot so don't be surprised if things are still confusing going into diablo 3. But she IS cute.

Having never played a Diablo game, that was perfectly sized and informative for me.

Only one small thingy missing (the thing with the prince), but very enjoyable if not only for the cute drawings ^_^

dmase:
Yo escapist get rid of the new guy and give her his job.

I am not so reluctantly forced to agree.

Also, did anyone else get a GLaDOS vibe when she says "Have fun"?

Gxas:
I enjoyed that, so I followed the link to her channel, where my ears were raped by nyan cat.

Gxas is not pleased.

Goddammit, how do you "Like" posts here.

Yeah that's about the size of it. Of course the story that most people hear in Diablo can be summed up with "Kill stuff, get loot, kill more stuff, get more loot, repeat"

She sounds like a human GLaDOS to me...

Better than the Jim guy...

Makes a LOT more sense now. lol.

Iklwa:
GIVE. HER. SHOW. Please :)

Yep. She's good.

I mean, really good. She's witty and has great delivery and definitely a knack for Internet pacing on news and entertainment alike. I see a future here.

It's not like The Escapist hasn't already taken a funny, beautiful lady and allowed her to craft sweet, sweet entertainment for us.

Shes called dodger and she has a pretty popular youtube channel, i dont really follow her but i seen a few shows and shes pretty genuine and seems nice

I found her watching the popular SC2 caster Husky, they are RL friends

Shes pretty gorgeous too, lolololol

edit: i just read that and i said 'pretty' alot...im okay with it!

This is why whenever someone tries to tell me about how Diablo's story is so complex and awesome I reflexively burst into laughter.

Srs.

Also, just comparing this video to the Jimquisition video, I have to agree I find Dodger the more artful of the two. Will have to check out some of her other clips for deeper investigation.

Edit: upon further review, I do still prefer listening to Dodger over Jim just in terms of delivery, but I'm not sure what she'd have for a show here. Neutral conclusion.

Dodger is epic. It's true she should have a show on the Escapist, but go here to watch her gaming (and other things) videos: http://www.youtube.com/user/PressHeartToContinue

It's good viewing, promise! :D

Dodger? On the Escapist?

Me gusta.
image

EDIT: And BTW... Dodger is better than Jim IMO.

Sexy.

all hail the Lard King!

Can's description of the king can be ignored. I doubt there were many kings described as a 'pathetic lardass with a sponge for brains' within a few months/years of their deaths back in the day.

On the bright side if not for all those villagers being led into the catacombs and dying there might not have been enough loot for the Hero to complete his quest, Wirt would not have been crippled, and thus the Cow Dimention would have remained sealed forever. Unthinkable.

Cowabungaa:
Very good indeed! This'll get me ready for Diablo 3 just fine because I just couldn't wrestle through Diablo 1. While I can see the great concept behind it it just felt too...archaic, and had little redeeming value otherwise (since I'm not much of a lootwhore). It could've been one of my favourite games if only I played it years ago. Modern technology has spoiled me.

Edit
Well, that story doesn't sound too shabby at all. The video's hilarious to boot. Plus that girl is extremely cute. Sorry...

Not enough f's or u's at 1:04. ;p

You people thought that was not only good but give her a job good? My comedy meter must not be calibrated for these forums cuz I thought...

http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/flash/romjul
and
http://www.vimeo.com/2809991

... were funny and I didn't find a lick of humor in this.

*goes back to finding the one genuinely lol line in every other Unskippable*

That was pretty awsome, I hope to see dodger more offten.

 

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