Jon Stewart Dings Spies With Hentai Octopus And Dwarf Paladins

Jon Stewart Dings Spies With Hentai Octopus And Dwarf Paladins

Some of you may recognize that schoolgirl.

The Daily Show's Jon Stewart loves him some hentai, and as luck would have it, there's a spy octopus out there with his name on it. Well, his and everyone else's, and if all you're after is the schoolgirl, slip ahead to about 3.00. Yes, NROL-39 exists, it's a real thing. Stewart just figured Tsukiko belonged up there too.

Tsuikiko Tsutsukakushi is one of the main characters of The Hentai Prince and the Stony Cat, a series that ironically features little more than innuendo. That may be why Stewart's team chose it.

But those of you who don't slip ahead are in for fun times. It seems as if the NSA's been in the media more often than a Hollywood starlet recently, and Stewart dings it, and the current administration, with all the joy of a kid on Christmas morning. Stick around for senior intelligence correspondent Greychalk; you're in for a treat!

Source: Kotaku

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I have absolutely no idea wtf this article is talking about.
Let's start off with a translation of "to ding someone".

*Snerk*

"What have I been doing with my life?!" - I lost it at that point.

Not sure how to react to the imagery America's spy's are willing to embrace... ..might have been intended to be ironic, but comes off as really creepy.

image

What was the saying in East Germany? To know everything?

What the fuck does it mean to "ding" someone?

Fasckira:
What the fuck does it mean to "ding" someone?

ding
verb: ding; 3rd person present: dings; past tense: dinged; past participle: dinged; gerund or present participle: dinging

1.
make a ringing sound.
"cash registers were dinging softly"

exclamation: ding

1.
used to imitate a metallic ringing sound resembling a bell.

So I guess he was using them as a bell? I didn't notice when that happened in the video though.

I really don't understand my Government anymore. This stuff is clearly James Bond Villian-level of nefarious, and yet not a single person of authority thought that this might be over the line? Not one person!

The problem is they'll probably have their Giant Orbital Death Ray in the production stages before anyone decides to do anything with their outrage besides grumble about it on Twitter.

loa:
I have absolutely no idea wtf this article is talking about.
Let's start off with a translation of "to ding someone".

Fasckira:
What the fuck does it mean to "ding" someone?

CriticalMiss:

Fasckira:
What the fuck does it mean to "ding" someone?

ding
verb: ding; 3rd person present: dings; past tense: dinged; past participle: dinged; gerund or present participle: dinging

1.
make a ringing sound.
"cash registers were dinging softly"

exclamation: ding

1.
used to imitate a metallic ringing sound resembling a bell.

So I guess he was using them as a bell? I didn't notice when that happened in the video though.

It basically means to knock someone in an irritating, but kind of harmless way. Like if someone dents or scratches your car, it's referred to as a "ding".

So... the NSA worships Chtulu?

I can dig that.

pretty convincing, though he's clearly a priest, not a paladin XD

So...uh...is Jon Stewart able to write some hentai for us? Because we apparently have similar tastes...

Joking aside, I couldn't contain myself towards the end of Greychalk's segment where he finally realizes that he wasted more of his life than he should have. Granted, pretty much that whole MMORPG segment was filled was like an assault of laughter.

That octopus looks familiar.

image

The USA becoming it's own worst enemy one week at a time

According to Ryan Haywood (of Rooster Teeth and Achievement Hunter), the WoW footage they used was taken right from their Mists of Pandaria Let's Play:
https://twitter.com/RyanTheTwit/status/410283969343537152

I'm guessing that they didn't ask to use it.

The usage of octupus and the earth would be ALMOST understandable if:

1. The octopus wasn't blatantly grasping the earth

2. The octopus wasn't glaring like a bad guy (also note that artist has intentionallty made the octopus glare, because octopus can't glare and can only show emotion through color changes)

3. The "nothing is beyond our reach" was removed.

The joke made itself.

They should change their logo to;

"NSA: Fuck it, we're evil now."

Will save time and confusion.

Ahhh, Hentai Ouji to Warawanai Neko.

That was a pretty good anime...

As for the video, well. There have always been people who believe a government official when he says they're not watching you, when he says that elected officials are not pigs feeding at the trough, getting away with as much theft and they can before it's someone elses' turn, when they claim this or that... People who'll wait for evidence of government misconduct before just assuming it.

Those people are pretty stupid.

News of the government breaking the law and the constitution isn't news. It's par for the course. It's something you should just assume, because you'll be unambiguously right.

I love me some Jon Stewart, but was it really necessary to couple discussion of the US's repeated, gross breaches of its own damn laws with sub-Big-Bang-Theory levels of 'hahaha, nerds are /nerds/' humour?

Oh Jon Stewart, he can try to hide it but he's totally watching tentacle hentai. Trust me, the NSA is already onto him.

I guess you can call some players on WoW terrorist since whenever I play alliance those horde rogue bastards always cheap shot me. Quit terrorizing low levels you jerks!

Unrelated to the actual subject matter (I prefer to avoid political discussions when I can), but I have to give Jon Steward full props for the 72 virgins jab. Well played, good sir. Well played.

Welp, it's official: The US intelligence community has acknowledged that it's basically the Stasi now.

Seriously, though: that patch is not funny, guys and gals of the NRO. Not even close to being funny.

We sure John's not originally from Kentucky? I hear they're pretty big on that kinda stuff there.

And oh aasif mand- I mean, Greychalk. Ever since colbert left he's probably been my favorite. Loved the Mac crack though, and about in world gold.

So a bigot making fun of games is complaining about people spying on him. right.
What the hell was the whole second part about?

 

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