Fresh off the debatable success of his remake of Halloween 2, musician-turned-filmmaker Rob Zombie has announced plans to remake The Blob, only without "a big red blobby thing."
"My intention is not to have a big red blobby thing, that's the first thing I want to change," Zombie told Variety. "That gigantic Jello-looking thing might have been scary to audiences in the 1950s, but people would laugh now. I have a totally different take, one that's pretty dark."
While some would argue that a crucial part of The Blob is the actual "blob" itself, Zombie argues that the film is less about an evil creature and more about ideas.
"I intend to make it scary, and the great thing is, I have the freedom once again to take it in any crazy direction I want to. Even more than Halloween, where I had to deal with accepted iconic characters like Michael Myers and Laurie Strode. The Blob is more concept than specific storyline with characters, so I can go nuts with it."
I almost wish news posts had echo effects so I could just loop Rob Zombie saying "so I can go nuts with it" over and over and over again. That makes about as much sense as the rest of this idea.