Keeping the hamsters running, one day at a time.

Ask me about my banhammer

You escaped from The Escapist's Phantom of the Arcade text adventure!

When duty calls, they pick up the phone.

Earned the Sergeant Apone result in the "Which Marine from Aliens Are You?" Quiz

Voted for Persona 4 Golden for 2012’s Game of the Year!

VICTORIOUS!

Thank you for helping us win 3 Webbys!

We won the Webby...because we rule!

Holy cow BATTERIES! It's what I always wanted!

I got off the Desert Bus in Las Vegas, Nevada!

Watched 3 episodes of Unskippable

You're smarter than him! Congrats on getting 100% on the Escapist Birthday Quiz!

I downloaded Issue 210 as a PDF!

"Crush your enemies!"

Has posted in more than 10 different forums.

This doesn't mean pyscho crazy or anything...just regular awesome crazy...which borderlines sugar-high crazy

"Ring out the old, ring in the new, Ring, happy bells, across the snow" - Tennyson

Has posted in more than 3 different forums.

Has created a user profile.

Has added a friend!

Has been added as a friend.

Has set an avatar.

Over 100 posts without incurring moderator wrath. [2 week minimum]

Has commented on over 100 different topics.

Has been added as a friend by 10 others.

Maybe you're good, maybe you're not. But you're definitely you, and that's what matters.

Correctly identified all 30 zombies in WarCry's 30 Zombies in 30 Seconds game!

Correctly identified all 30 monsters in WarCry's 30 Monsters in 30 Seconds game!

You completed all three Halloween events! A Hallo-winner is you!

Has added more than 10 friends.

Has fought 1 battle

The ZP Mashup was no match for me! *flex*

Has received and read messages from 10 people.

Has received and read messages from 25 people.

Has received and read messages from 50 people.

Has won a battle

Has won 1 battle without the loss of a complete army

"Surrender Monkey!"

Has fought 10 battles

Has earned more than 20,000 in a single battle

Has won 10 battles

Has won more than one battle consecutively

Has posted in more than 12 different months.

Has been added as a friend by 25 others.

Created a thread with over 1,000 views.

For creating a thread with over 50 replies.

I was part of The Escapist's TF2 Tournament!

For taking the Escapist Birthday Quiz.

Celebrating 4 years of The Escapist!

Completed 5 quizzes and even got some questions right!

Got the Good Ending in POTA2

Member of 1 User Group

Watched two episodes of The Escapist Show

Watched 8 episodes of The Escapist Show

Watched Red Alert on The Escapist Show

Watched the Apocalypse Lane pilot episode.

Watched 5 episodes of Doomsday Arcade

Watched 10 episodes of Doomsday Arcade

Watched 7 episodes of Unskippable

Watched 15 episodes of Unskippable

Watched 25 episodes of Unskippable

Watched 35 episodes of Unskippable

Watched all of Metal Gear August on Unskippable

Watched Rebecca Mayes Muse

Has read at least one article in 5 weekly issues of The Escapist

Has read 5 Stolen Pixels comics.

Has read 25 Stolen Pixels comics.

Watched 15 episodes of Doomsday Arcade

You know who will win in a fight between a T-Rex and a million kittens.

Has read 75 Stolen Pixels comics.

Has read at least one article in 26 weekly issues of The Escapist

Has completed 10 quizzes.

Aced the 30 Robots in 30 Seconds Quiz

Aced the 30 Vampires in 30 Seconds Quiz

Aced the 30 Horror Movies in 30 Seconds Quiz

Got the Bad Ending in POTA2

Completed the events in the Halloween Extravaganza

Watched 20 episodes of The Escapist Show

Gamers are the new supermen.

Watched more than one Rebecca Mayes Musing

Watched 45 episodes of Unskippable

Enjoyed the contents of the 2009 Advent Calendar

Watched 7 episodes of Apocalypse Lane

Has posted in a user group on over 30 different days.

Watched 52 episodes of Unskippable

Watched 4 episodes of Rebecca Mayes Muses

"See them driven before you!"

Locked and Loaded! Hoo-rah! Join our AVP Battle!

Has received and read messages from 100 people.

Has connected their twitter account to their user profile

Over 1000 posts without incurring moderator wrath. [2 month minimum]

Has read 150 Stolen Pixels comics.

Member of 15 user groups

Has completed 25 quizzes.

You attack games as the cerebral challenges they are.

You do fairly well in a crisis, but best not to push it.

I downloaded issue 261 as a PDF

You make ass-kicking an art form.

There's only so much love to go around. You dole your share out carefully.

What you lack in height you make up for in charm.

You're one bad dude, and are totally going to hell for that.

Has connected their profile to their Facebook account.

The fates have decided ... along with your help.

Yeah, you're kind of a nerd. So what, isn't everybody?

You'd put this badge in your profile, but it just takes so much effort...

Has read at least one article in 52 weekly issues of The Escapist

Candy! Candycandycandycandycandy!

Candy! Candycandycandycandycandy!

Candy! Candycandycandycandycandy!

Candy! Candycandycandycandycandy!

Candy! Candycandycandycandycandy!

Candy! Candycandycandycandycandy!

Candy! Candycandycandycandycandy!

You can recognize a song or two from a game - it's placing them that's the problem.

Candy! Candycandycandycandycandy!

Candy! Candycandycandycandycandy!

Candy! Candycandycandycandycandy!

Candy! Candycandycandycandycandy!

Candy! Candycandycandycandycandy!

Candy! Candycandycandycandycandy!

Robe and hat not included.

Pure-hearted and innocent, you bring sunshine to the world. Healing spells, too.

I survived The Escapist's first ever Puzzle Adventure!!

Don't panic.

Has added their Xbox Live gamertag to their profile.

Banished from the light centuries ago, you are a dark elf, cruel and strong.

So terribly tortured inside.

The first time is always the best time.

Watched 50 Zero Punctuation reviews.

Witnessed the introduction of a legend

Filled out a March Mayhem 2011 Bracket

Watched 4 episodes of Anthony Saves the World

Whatever you do, don't click here.

Has linked their Steam account on their profile.

Shared a piece of content using the Like button

Has posted in more than 36 different months. Wow!

Fight me if you dare.

Trapped in Nightmare Mansion.

Earn badges from 5 different Escapist shows

Watched 5 episodes of Extra Credits

You've uncovered the 11th Game of Christmas of 2011!

You've uncovered the 12th Game of Christmas of 2011!

You've uncovered the 10th Game of Christmas of 2011!

You've uncovered the 9th Game of Christmas of 2011!

You've uncovered the 8th Game of Christmas of 2011!

You've uncovered the 7th Game of Christmas of 2011!

You've uncovered the 6th Game of Christmas of 2011!

You've uncovered the 4th Game of Christmas of 2011!

You've uncovered the 3rd Game of Christmas of 2011!

You've uncovered the 2nd Game of Christmas of 2011!

You've uncovered the 5th Game of Christmas of 2011!

You've uncovered the 1st Game of Christmas of 2011!

You've uncovered all the Games of Christmas of 2011!

Filled out a March Mayhem 2012 Bracket

Earned the Human result in the "Which Mass Effect Race Are You?" Quiz

Cats, caterpillars, coasters, copulation!

Created a thread with over 10,000 views.

He come to town / come to save / the Princess Zelda!

Awarded to members of the Publisher's Club

Celebrating one year of amazing music by Miracle of Sound!

Earned the USS Enterprise

You're no stranger to the Star Treks and the Star Wars of the film world.

Going to need some heavy duty antibiotics for this one.

Vigilo Confido

YOU are the enemy unknown.

I know what you're going to say.

An NPC Elite Mob has spawned!

Participated in the XCOM Community Event!

Has posted in a user group on over 120 different days.

Underneath the Princess's smile, there's nothing but malice.

The wicked witch is scary no matter what cardinal direction they are from.

You are the scariest letter.

Arr, you scurvy dogs, beware my blade.

Who wasn't scared of that thing?

A fire djinn is the worst kind.

Stick 'em in the tuckus!

We are not alone.

The scariest sporting equipment ever created.

Don't watch Killer Clowns from Outer Space.

Earned the Fluffy Cat result in the "What's My Evil Pet?" Quiz!

They stole it from us. My precious.

Watched 100 Zero Punctuation Reviews

I wouldn't click on me if I were you.

You participated in The Escapist's DUST 514 live streaming event!

Do.Not.Click.This.Button

Going to any page on WarCry.com

When you removed the book from the cradle, did you speak the words?

You've completed the SimCity quiz like a robot completing a city's destruction.

You've Seen Movies

Has completed 50 quizzes.

Has watched 5 Top 5 with Lisa Foiles

Has watched 10 Top 5 with Lisa Foiles

Everything you need to take care of those pesky space invaders!

Watched 150 Zero Punctuation Reviews

Assistant to Special Liaison Odekar

There will be blood in the water and the sharks will come.

Aka the parts when you're not stabbing folks.

Entering a giveaway on WarCry.com

Lisa Foiles - Internet Celebrity, even if she left off Ducktales that one time.

Watched 5 episodes of Jimquisition

In their tongue, he is Dovahkiin... DRAGON BORN!

Seen all Miracle of Sound videos featured in Gavin's Level 3 Album

Take me to the crush!

Get in your cars, my friends, and drive.

Watched 25 episodes of Jimquisition

That'll do.

Tanks for playing.

You read the very first This is How We Do It!

Has been added as a friend by 50 others.